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THE FOLLOWING BAR CHART SHOWS THE DIFFERENT MODES OF TRANSPORT USED TO TRAVEL TO AND FROM WORK IN ONE EUROPEAN CITY IN 1960,1980 AND 2000

THE GIVEN BAR CHART ILLUSTRATES THE VARIOUS MODE OF TRANSPORTION TO TRAVEL FROM ONE CITY TO OTHER IN EUROPE IN THE YEARS 1960, 1980 AND 2000. OVERALL, IT SHOWS THE FLUNCTUATIONS ON A GIVEN PERIOD OF TIME. THE HEIGHEST RATE IS DEPICTED ON CAR, WHEN IT COMPARED TO OTHER TRANSPORTION GROUP. AS PER THE GIVEN DATA, IT IS CLEAR THAT IN 1960 THE PEOPLE WHO TRAVELLED ON FOOT IS GRADUALLY INCREASED AROUND 35% BUT, THERE IS A DECLINE OF 10 PERCENTAGE WHICH ACCOUNTED 25% THROUGH BIKE. MEANWHILE, THERE IS A STEAP DECREASED WHEN IT USED BY CAR. LATER WHEN COMPARED TO BUS IT ROSE UPTO 17%. IT CHANGED AFTER 2 DECADE(1980), AT THIS PERIOD PEOPLE USED BUS NEARLY 26%WHEN IT COMPARED TO CAR WHICH SHOWED A 23 % FROM A FALL OF 3 %. ALSO THE SAME DIP FROM BIKE RIDERS AND WALKERS (5% AND 7 % RESPECTIVELY). BY 2000, THE HUGE RATE USED FOR CAR TRANSPORTION WHICH ACCOUNTED FOR OVER 35 %. THERE IS A DROP IN ALL OTHER MEANS OF TRANSPOTION BUT THE LEAST PROPORTION WAS IN THE BIKE TRAVELLERS.
THE
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GIVEN
BAR CHART ILLUSTRATES THE VARIOUS MODE OF
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TRANSPORTION
TO TRAVEL FROM ONE CITY TO OTHER IN EUROPE IN THE YEARS 1960, 1980 AND 2000.

OVERALL
, IT
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SHOWS
THE
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FLUNCTUATIONS
ON A
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GIVEN
PERIOD OF TIME. THE
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HEIGHEST
RATE
IS DEPICTED
ON
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CAR
, WHEN IT COMPARED TO OTHER
Possible spelling mistake found.
TRANSPORTION
GROUP.

AS PER THE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
GIVEN
DATA, IT IS
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
CLEAR
THAT IN 1960 THE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
PEOPLE
WHO TRAVELLED ON FOOT IS
GRADUALLY
INCREASED AROUND 35%
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BUT
, THERE IS A DECLINE OF 10 PERCENTAGE WHICH ACCOUNTED 25% THROUGH BIKE. MEANWHILE, THERE IS A
Possible spelling mistake found.
STEAP
DECREASED WHEN IT
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
USED
BY
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CAR
. LATER WHEN COMPARED TO BUS IT ROSE
Possible spelling mistake found.
UPTO
17%.

IT
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CHANGED
AFTER 2 DECADE(1980), AT THIS PERIOD
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PEOPLE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
USED
BUS
NEARLY
26%WHEN IT COMPARED TO
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CAR
WHICH
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SHOWED
A 23 % FROM A FALL OF 3 %.
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ALSO
THE SAME DIP FROM BIKE RIDERS AND WALKERS (5% AND 7 %
RESPECTIVELY
).

BY 2000, THE HUGE RATE
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
USED
FOR
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
CAR
Possible spelling mistake found.
TRANSPORTION
WHICH ACCOUNTED FOR OVER 35 %. THERE IS A DROP IN ALL OTHER MEANS OF
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TRANSPOTION
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
BUT
THE LEAST PROPORTION WAS IN THE BIKE
Possible spelling mistake. ‘TRAVELLERS’ is British English.
TRAVELLERS
.
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IELTS academic THE FOLLOWING BAR CHART SHOWS THE DIFFERENT MODES OF TRANSPORT USED TO TRAVEL TO AND FROM WORK IN ONE EUROPEAN CITY IN 1960, 1980 AND 2000

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
182 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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