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the fairtrade-labelled sales of two commodities in five countries in 1999 and 2004

the fairtrade-labelled sales of two commodities in five countries in 1999 and 2004 5ba8e
The tables represented below display the fairtrade-labelled sales of two commodities in five countries in 1999 and 2004. The data’s numbers have been calibrated in million of euros. Generally, in 1999, Denmark had the highest sales quantity rather than the other countries, while Switzerland was known as the first-rank country on bananas selling. Furthermore, the United Kingdom had the dominant sales’ amount both on coffee and bananas in 2004. Specifically, based on the first table, the United Kingdom had the most overwhelming rise on its coffee selling during these periods. In contrast, Sweden became the country with the lowest escalation on its coffee selling records. As well as the United Kingdom, in terms of the sales of bananas, Switzerland was recording the most significant selling progress during 1999 and 2004. Meanwhile, the United Kingdom was in the second rank of this commodity selling, by achieving 5. 5 million euros in 2004. On the other side, Denmark had experienced a decline on its selling as many as 1. 1 million euros.
The tables represented below display the
Possible spelling mistake found.
fairtrade-labelled
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sales
of two commodities in five
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countries
in 1999 and 2004. The data’s numbers have
been calibrated
in
Use "a million" or use a number before 'million'.
million
of euros.

Generally
, in 1999, Denmark had the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
quantity
rather
than the other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, while Switzerland
was known
as the
first
-rank
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
on bananas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
selling
.
Furthermore
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
United
Kingdom had the dominant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales’
amount both on coffee and bananas in 2004.

Specifically
, based on the
first
table, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
United
Kingdom had the most overwhelming rise on its coffee
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
selling
during these periods.
In contrast
, Sweden became the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
with the lowest escalation on its coffee
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
selling
records.

As well
as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
United
Kingdom, in terms of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
of bananas, Switzerland was recording the most significant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
selling
progress during 1999 and 2004. Meanwhile, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
United
Kingdom was in the second rank of this commodity
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
selling
, by achieving 5. 5 million euros in 2004. On the other side, Denmark had experienced a decline on its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
selling
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
as 1. 1 million euros.
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IELTS academic the fairtrade-labelled sales of two commodities in five countries in 1999 and 2004

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
170 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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