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the export values of products

the export values of products 568lD
The table outlines the export income of equipment, telecommunity, clothing, manufacturing and metals from 1997 to 2010, which is measured by billions of Hong Kong dollars. Overall, as can be seen from the table, the turnover of equipment, telecommunity and metals increased. Whereas, the export values of clothing and manufacturing decreased. Especially, the changing percentage of metals was the highest. Looking at the table in more detail, between 1997 to 2010, the overall export values increased from 32 to 38. 4. An increase from 10. 3 to 11. 6 was seen in the income of equipment. While, there was a rise from 7. 9 to 12. 7 in the export income of telecommunity. Next, the income of metals was lower with 2. 3 in 1997 and 5. 1 in 2010. Meanwhile, from 1997 to 2010, a decrease from 6 to 5 was seen in the export values of clothing. While, the income of manufacturing was lower with 5. 5 in 1997 and 4 in 2010.
The table outlines the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
export
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
of equipment,
Possible spelling mistake found.
telecommunity
, clothing, manufacturing and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
metals
from 1997 to 2010, which
is measured
by billions of Hong Kong dollars.

Overall
, as can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
from the table, the turnover of equipment,
Possible spelling mistake found.
telecommunity
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
metals
increased. Whereas, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
export
values of clothing and manufacturing decreased.
Especially
, the changing percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
metals
was the highest.

Looking at the table in more detail,
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 1997 and 2010".
between 1997 to 2010
, the
overall
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
export
values increased from 32 to 38. 4. An increase from 10. 3 to 11. 6 was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
of equipment.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
, there was a rise from 7. 9 to 12. 7 in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
export
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
telecommunity
.
Next
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
metals
was lower with 2. 3 in 1997 and 5. 1 in 2010.

Meanwhile, from 1997 to 2010, a decrease from 6 to 5 was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
export
values of clothing.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
of manufacturing was lower with 5. 5 in 1997 and 4 in 2010.
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IELTS academic the export values of products

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
165 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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