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The expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010

The expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010 KEK3
The bart chart illustrated represents how much has been spent in five different products, such as cars, computers, books, perfume and cameras, in France and UK, on the year of 2010 by its population. Regarding the most consumed good, we can conclude that vehicles are in the lead in both countries, but not by a long shot. As represented, we can analyze that their is being more than 50. 000 million pounds spent in automobiles by the britan´s than the french. However, France citizens tend to buy more PC and perfumes than the British population, with a difference of 30. 000 million pounds in each category. Nevertheless, the United Kingdom have an urge to invest more in books and cameras, which set them on the lead by an advantage of 100. 000 million pounds on literature and 200. 000 on photography equipment. To conclude, people usually spend more money on cars, computers and books, than in cameras and perfume, on the other hand, their are much more expensive.
The
bart
chart illustrated represents how much has
been spent
in five
different
products, such as cars, computers, books, perfume and cameras, in France and UK, on the year of 2010 by its population. Regarding the most consumed
good
, we can conclude that vehicles are in the lead in both countries,
but
not by a long shot. As represented, we can analyze that
their
is being more than 50. 000 million pounds spent in automobiles by the
britan
´s than the
french
.
However
, France citizens tend to
buy
more PC and perfumes than the British population, with a difference of 30. 000 million pounds in each category.
Nevertheless
, the United Kingdom have an urge to invest more in books and cameras, which set them on the lead by an advantage of 100. 000 million pounds on literature and 200. 000 on photography equipment.
To conclude
,
people
usually
spend more money on cars, computers and books, than in cameras and perfume,
on the other hand
,
their
are much more expensive.
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IELTS academic The expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
168 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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