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The diagrams below show the stages and equipment used in the cement-making process, and how cement is used to produce concrete for building purposes.

The diagram illustrates the different methods and tools used in Cement Manufacturing and Concrete Making for constructions. Firstly, Limestone and Clay are kept together in crusher, which mixes and get Powdered Substance. The powder than sent into Mixer which moves the powder substance to Rotating Heater, and additional heat is given to that. Further, by heating the substance is moved to Grinder, thereafter by crushing Cement is produced. Then that is packed in bags for Marketing. Later, Cement and Water is mixed one-fourth in Concrete Mixer. By mixing sand and gravel which are small stones the mixer than rotates in clock-wise direction. By adding, all these materials with defined proportions the Concrete is produced.
The diagram illustrates the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
methods and tools
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in Cement Manufacturing and Concrete Making for constructions.

Firstly
, Limestone and Clay are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
together in crusher, which mixes and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
Powdered Substance. The powder than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
into Mixer which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moves
the powder substance to Rotating Heater, and additional heat is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to that.
Further
, by heating the substance is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
to Grinder, thereafter by crushing Cement
is produced
. Then that
is packed
in bags for Marketing.

Later, Cement and Water
is mixed
one-fourth in Concrete Mixer. By mixing sand and gravel which are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
stones the mixer than rotates in clock-wise direction. By adding, all these materials with defined proportions the Concrete
is produced
.
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IELTS academic The diagrams below show the stages and equipment used in the cement-making process, and how cement is used to produce concrete for building purposes.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
114 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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