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the diagrams below show the stages and equipment used in the cement-making process, and how cement is used to produce concrete for building purposes.summarise the informatin by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

the diagrams below show the stages and equipment used in the cement-making process, and how cement is used to produce concrete for building purposes. summarise the informatin by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. 56WmB
The diagrams demonstrate the cement production tools and step by step instruction, and then how concrete is produced by cement for goals of construction. Overview, cement is made of limestone and clay with equipment and then it is altered to concrete with the determinate percentage of cement and water. Cement production, to begin with, limestone and clay are poured into the crusher and then is changed to powder. The powder is sent onto the big mixer. It is crossed a tube and entered in the rotating heater. When the material is within the rotating heater, is heated by fire. Then, the powder is ejected on the grinder, therefore, is changed to cement. Finally, the cement is produced. And next, it is put in to bags. Concrete is provided from cement and water. At first, 15 percent of cement, 10 percent water, next 25 percent sand with 50 percent gravel are dropped into the concrete mixer. The mixer is rotated with materials and concrete is ready.
The diagrams demonstrate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
production tools and
Did you mean the adjective or adverb "step-by-step" (spelled with hyphens)?
step by step
instruction, and then how concrete
is produced
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
for goals of construction.

Overview,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
is made
of limestone and clay with equipment and then it
is altered
to concrete with the determinate percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
and water.

Cement production, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, limestone and clay
are poured
into the crusher and then is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
to powder. The powder is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
onto the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
mixer. It
is crossed
a tube and
There isn't usually a preposition after "entered". Did you mean "entered the rotating"?
entered in the rotating
heater. When the material is within the rotating heater,
is heated
by fire. Then, the powder
is ejected
on the grinder,
therefore
, is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
.
Finally
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
is produced
. And
next
, it
is put
in to bags.

Concrete
is provided
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
and water. At
first
, 15
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cement
, 10
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
water,
next
25
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
sand with 50
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
gravel
are dropped
into the concrete mixer. The mixer
is rotated
with materials and concrete is ready.

IELTS academic the diagrams below show the stages and equipment used in the cement-making process, and how cement is used to produce concrete for building purposes. summarise the informatin by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
165 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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