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THE DIAGRAM ILLUSTRATES HOW BEES PRODUCE HONEY. SUMMARISE THE INFORMATION BY SELECTING AND REPORTING THE MAIN FEATURES, AND MAKE COMPARISONS WHERE RELEVANT

THE DIAGRAM ILLUSTRATES HOW BEES PRODUCE HONEY. BljR9
The diagram gives information about hoe honey is produced by bees. The whole process is explained in seven steps. Overall, the process start with constructing hives by honey bees for shelter and process is ended by collecting honey in containers for sale. First, bees build a hive for their living purpose; next, bees are in the process of searching of a sweet liquid produced by flowers. Subsequently, they collect honey from flowers. After that obtained liquid stored in the cells. Then, following this, the nectar should be cool down. The bees fan the nectar filled- cells with their wings. As a result, water is evaporated from the nectar and finally, the nectar is ready to fill in the containers
The diagram gives information about hoe honey
is produced
by bees. The whole
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
process
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explained
in seven steps.

Overall
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
process
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with constructing hives by honey bees for shelter and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
process
is ended
by collecting honey in containers for sale.

First
, bees build a hive for their living purpose;
next
, bees are in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
process
of searching of a sweet liquid produced by flowers.
Subsequently
, they collect honey from flowers.
“After” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
After
that obtained liquid stored in the cells.

Then, following this, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nectar
should be cool down. The bees fan the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nectar
filled- cells with their wings.
As a result
, water
is evaporated
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nectar
and
finally
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nectar
is ready to fill in the
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
containers
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IELTS academic THE DIAGRAM ILLUSTRATES HOW BEES PRODUCE HONEY.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
118 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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