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The diagram explains the way in which steel rods are produced for the furniture industry.

The diagram explains the way in which steel rods are produced for the furniture industry. kbN02
The diagram explains the way in which steel rods are produced for the furniture industry. Overall, the process consists of eleven stages, beginning with the raw material and ending up with the product’s inspection. First of all, iron ore, yellow ore, and carbon are collected to serve as a raw material for steel rods manufacturing. After that, the raw material is melted in a melting slit, where it is heated to a temperature in the range of 1300-1500 degree celsius. The melted mass is then transferred to a smelting cabin to undergo refinement. Next, the condescent metal is put in a pouring machine and poured into ingots. In the next stage, the ingots are connected to a cooling reservoir, where the temperature falls to 60-100 degree celsius. Metal goes through special nozzles and cools down forming strands. Following this, the metal strand proceeds to rollers that change their shape. Next, the products are put into a heating machine, where they undergo heat treatment. Subsequently, a measuring automaton completes a surface check of the product. After that, the metal rods are sized by special cutters and get ID stamping. Finally, the product undergoes inspection and is ready for use.
The diagram
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explains
the way in which steel rods
are produced
for the furniture industry.

Overall
, the process consists of eleven stages, beginning with the raw material and ending up with the product’s inspection.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, iron ore, yellow ore, and carbon
are collected
to serve as a raw material for steel rods manufacturing. After that, the raw material
is melted
in a melting slit, where it
is heated
to a temperature in the range of 1300-1500 degree
Possible spelling mistake found.
celsius
. The melted mass is then transferred to a smelting cabin to undergo refinement.
Next
, the
Possible spelling mistake found.
condescent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
metal
is put
in a pouring machine and poured into ingots.

In the
next
stage, the ingots
are connected
to a cooling reservoir, where the temperature falls to 60-100 degree
Possible spelling mistake found.
celsius
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Metal
goes through special nozzles and cools down forming strands. Following this, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
metal
strand proceeds to rollers that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their shape.
Next
, the products
are put
into a heating machine, where they undergo heat treatment.
Subsequently
, a measuring automaton completes a surface
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
of the product.

After that, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
metal
rods
are sized
by special cutters and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
ID stamping.
Finally
, the product undergoes inspection and is ready for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
.
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IELTS academic The diagram explains the way in which steel rods are produced for the furniture industry.

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
198 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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