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the diagram details the process of making wool. summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

the diagram details the process of making wool. 95Rk0
The picture shows the procedures by which wool is processed and transformed into a variety of products. Looking from an overall perspective, it is readily apparent that processing wool involves initial stages of preparation of the raw source material, middle stages constituting the production of tufts, and the final stages resulting in yarn and finished consumer products. The process begins when sheep wool is sheared, cleaned, and then dried. Subsequent to this the raw product is spun and then either made into a string (with some being recycled as a byproduct) or turned into wool. The wool is fashioned into tufts of wool and then stored. The last steps involve turning the tufts into balls of yarn which can then be used for knitting or for the fabrication of consumer retail items such as jackets and carpets.
The picture
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
the procedures by which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wool
is processed
and transformed into a variety of products. Looking from an
overall
perspective, it is
readily
apparent that processing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wool
involves initial stages of preparation of the raw source material, middle stages constituting the production of tufts, and the final stages resulting in yarn and finished consumer products.

The process
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begins
when sheep
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wool
is sheared
, cleaned, and then dried.
Consider using "after"
Subsequent to
this the raw product
is spun
and then either made into a string (with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
being recycled
as a byproduct) or turned into wool.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wool
is fashioned
into tufts of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wool
and then stored. The last steps involve turning the tufts into balls of yarn which can then be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for knitting or for the fabrication of consumer retail items such as jackets and carpets.
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IELTS academic the diagram details the process of making wool.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
137 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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