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The diagram below show the process of canning of fish. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the process below.

The given diagram illustrates how to produce canning fish step by step. Overall, it can be seen from the diagram that, The presented process is man made, which is a fifteen steps, and endlinerd process. Its start with catching fish by people and completed with dispatch to supermarket. First of all, the fish catching by people than the fees to put in freezing storage by fisher. After that the freezer fish is put in unloading, then the unloading fish are weighing. In turn to the fish are putting to thaw compartment, after that the fish are thawed before cutting them. Then the fish are cutting into big pieces. The next step is the fish are being cooked, after that, they are putt in cooling machine, then the cold fish cutting into small pieces then to cut fish are put in to cans with add brine, water and oil. After this, the cans are sealed. Then its send in sterilizing by heating. The cans are labeled and stored. Finally, dispatched to supermarket by vehicle.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
diagram illustrates how to produce canning fish step by step.

Overall
, it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
can
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
from the diagram that, The presented process is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
made, which is a fifteen steps, and
Possible spelling mistake found.
endlinerd
process. Its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with catching fish by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and completed with dispatch to supermarket.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, the fish catching by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
than the fees to put in freezing storage by fisher. After that the freezer fish
is put
in unloading, then the unloading fish are weighing. In turn to the fish are putting to thaw compartment, after that the fish
are thawed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
cutting them. Then the fish are cutting into
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
pieces. The
next
step is the fish are
being cooked
, after that, they are putt in cooling machine, then the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cold
fish cutting into
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
pieces then to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
fish
are put
in to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cans
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
brine, water and oil. After this, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cans
are sealed
. Then its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
in sterilizing by heating. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cans
are labeled
and stored.
Finally
, dispatched to supermarket by vehicle.
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IELTS academic The diagram below show the process of canning of fish. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the process below.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
173 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Meet the criteria
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