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the data of monthly active users of chosen social network

the data of monthly active users of chosen social network 8dqNG
The line graph illustrates the data of monthly active users of chosen social network (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram etc. ) between 2010-2015. Overall, we can obviously say that all applications get loveable year by year. Facebook is the most popular application that is used. In 2010 Facebook had 600 million users, the only active users in the line graph. After a year, Twitter had 100 million users meanwhile Facebook increased and had 800 million real users. In 2012 Wechat and Twitter had the same numbers, nearly 200 million users. Facebook is also rised up to 1000 million active numbers. In 2013, Instagram and Whatsapp hit the chart with 200 million and 400 million monthly real users, respectively. Twitter slightly increased to 210 million and Wechat rose up to 400 million monthly active users. Facebook had also 1200 million active numbers and increased by 200 million in other years given. In 2014, Twitter had 300 million users and Instagram outscored it with 400 million active users. Wechat grew slowly in 2014 and had 500 million online users. Whatsapp rocketed to 800 million users in one year. In 2015 Twitter and Instagram stabalised in the line graph. Wechat and Whatsapp climbed respectively to 790 and 990 million active users.
The line graph illustrates the data of monthly
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active
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
users
of chosen social network (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram etc.
Don't put a space before the closing parenthesis
)
between 2010-2015.

Overall
, we can
obviously
say that all applications
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
loveable
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year
by
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year
. Facebook is the most popular application
that is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
.

In 2010 Facebook had 600
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million
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users
, the
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only
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active
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users
in the line graph. After a
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year
, Twitter had 100
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million
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users
meanwhile Facebook increased and had 800
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million
real
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users
. In 2012
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Wechat
and Twitter had the same numbers,
nearly
200
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million
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users
. Facebook is
also
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "rose", the past tense form of the verb 'rise'?
rised
up to 1000
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million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
active
numbers.

In 2013, Instagram and
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Whatsapp
hit the chart with 200
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million
and 400
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million
monthly real
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users
,
respectively
. Twitter
slightly
increased to 210
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million
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
Wechat
rose up to 400
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million
monthly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
active
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
users
. Facebook had
also
1200
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million
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active
numbers and increased by 200
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million
in other years
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given
. In 2014, Twitter had 300
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million
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users
and Instagram outscored it with 400
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million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
active
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
users
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Wechat
grew
slowly
in 2014 and had 500
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million
online
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users
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Whatsapp
rocketed to 800
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million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
users
in one
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year
. In 2015 Twitter and Instagram
Possible spelling mistake found.
stabalised
in the line graph.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Wechat
and
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Whatsapp
climbed
respectively
to 790 and 990
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
active
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
users
.
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IELTS academic the data of monthly active users of chosen social network

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
206 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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