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The charts shows air pollution levels by different causes among four countries in 2021. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The charts shows air pollution levels by different causes among four countries in 2021. PopB
This bar grpath represent the air contamination cause by three different sectors in countries like China, America, Japan, and Australia. Air pollution cause by Electricity generation, transport, and Industries is high in China compared to other countries. Air pollution cause by Industry sector stands at 80 PPM in China and the lowest recording stabds at 16 PPM cause by power generation in Japan. In Australia, air contamination records between 17 to 19 PPM for all the three sectors and is less when compared to other countries. Unlike other countries, transportation is major cause of air pollution in America at 58 PPM. In Japan, the pollution cause by Industry is almost twice the pollution cause by Electricity generation, with highest standing at 43 PPM and lowest at 24 PPM. Overall, air pollution in Australia is less by 3 folds when compared to China.
This bar
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grpath
represent the
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air
contamination
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cause
by three
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
sectors in countries like China, America, Japan, and Australia.

Air
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pollution
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cause
by Electricity generation, transport, and Industries is high in China compared to other countries.

Air
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pollution
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cause
by Industry sector stands at 80 PPM in China and the lowest recording
Possible spelling mistake found.
stabds
at 16 PPM
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cause
by power generation in Japan. In Australia,
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air
contamination records
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 17 and 19".
between 17 to 19
PPM for all the three sectors and is less when compared to other countries. Unlike other countries, transportation is major
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cause
of
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air
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pollution
in America at 58 PPM. In Japan, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
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cause
by Industry is almost twice the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
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cause
by Electricity generation, with
A determiner is probably missing here: "the highest".
highest
standing at 43 PPM and lowest at 24 PPM.

Overall
,
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air
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pollution
in Australia is less by 3 folds when compared to China.

IELTS academic The charts shows air pollution levels by different causes among four countries in 2021.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
142 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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