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The charts illustrate the amount of spending by percentages in different areas for daily living in Canada and Poland and comparison of life events in these two countries with estimated global average before age 35.

The charts illustrate the amount of spending by percentages in different areas for daily living in Canada and Poland and comparison of life events in these two countries with estimated global average before age 35. 7r8Ln
The charts illustrate the amount of spending by percentages in different areas for daily living in Canada and Poland and comparison of life events in these two countries with estimated global average before age 35. Regarding the proportion of spending their gains, people in Canada invest one-fifth of total income on Leisure and clothing at 20% and 19% respectively. Then, the Canadians equally spend approximately less than a fifth of total income on housing, food, transport and studies between 14% and 16%. On the contrary, the citizens from Poland use their budgets on studying nearly a half of total income at 43%, which is the largest proportion of expenditure. It is followed by expense on transportation just over a quarter of their earnings. Then, they spend less on the other area such as housing, food, leisure and clothing between 5% and 11%. Regarding average age of life events, the Canadians make choices on leaving home and buying before 20 years of age, which is much earlier than those from Poland at around 25. Moreover, compared to global average, both from Canada and Poland represent no significant difference on age of marriage. In summary, the people in Poland spend the majority of income on studying while those in Canada spend more evenly on various areas.
The charts illustrate the amount of spending by percentages in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
areas for daily living in Canada and Poland and comparison of life
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events
in these two countries with estimated global average
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before
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age
35.

Regarding the proportion of spending their gains,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in Canada invest one-fifth of total
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income
on Leisure and clothing at 20% and 19%
respectively
. Then, the Canadians
equally
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spend
approximately less than a fifth of total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
on housing, food, transport and studies between 14% and 16%.
On the contrary
, the citizens from Poland
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their budgets on studying
nearly
a half of total
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income
at 43%, which is the largest proportion of expenditure. It
is followed
by expense on transportation
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just
over a quarter of their earnings. Then, they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
less on the other area such as housing, food, leisure and clothing between 5% and 11%. Regarding average
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age
of life
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
, the Canadians
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
choices on leaving home and buying
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
20 years of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
, which is much earlier than those from Poland at around 25.
Moreover
, compared to global average, both from Canada and Poland represent no significant difference on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
of marriage.

In summary, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in Poland
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
on studying while those in Canada
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spend
more
evenly
on various areas.
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IELTS academic The charts illustrate the amount of spending by percentages in different areas for daily living in Canada and Poland and comparison of life events in these two countries with estimated global average before age 35.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
214 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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Lexical Resource: 5.5
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Grammatical Range: 6.5
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Task Achievement: 7.0
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