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The charts give show the information about people staying in three different accommodationareas in 1988,1998and2008.

The percentile of tourists preferred three kind of resides is depicted by the pie charts in given time period. At a fleeting glance, a significant proportion of tourists was preferred to the stay with family and friends in 1988, less than 8% of holidaymakers live in the same accommodations area in second year. Furthermore, a tiny proportion of tourists who were stay in camping in 1988, whereas 12 percent of holidaymakers preferred to live in same sectors.
The percentile of tourists preferred three
Possible agreement error. The noun ‘kind’ seems to be countable, so consider using: “kinds”.
kind
of resides
is depicted
by the pie charts in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
time period. At a fleeting glance, a significant proportion of tourists
was preferred
to the stay with family and friends in 1988, less than 8% of holidaymakers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the same
An apostrophe may be missing.
accommodations
area in second year.
Furthermore
, a tiny proportion of tourists who were
Consider using either the past participle “stayed” or the present participle “staying” here.
stay
in camping in 1988, whereas 12 percent of holidaymakers preferred to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in same sectors.

IELTS academic The charts give show the information about people staying in three different accommodationareas in 1988, 1998and2008.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
77 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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