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The charts below show the results of a questionnaire that asked visitors to the Parkway Hotel how they rated the hotel's customer service. The same questionnaire was given to 100 guests in the years 2005 and 2010.

The charts below show the results of a questionnaire that asked visitors to the Parkway Hotel how they rated the hotel's customer service. The same questionnaire was given to 100 guests in the years 2005 and 2010. NrMEg
The two pie charts display the outcome of the questionnaire that was asked to the visitors about the customer service of the Parkway Hotel. In the years 2005 and 2010, a similar questionnaire was given to 100 customers. Beginning with the result in 2005, 45 percent of guests rated the customer service satisfactory. The major turning point to the review was only 5 out of 100 guests appreciated excellent customer service, in addition, 36 percent of customers rated poor and very poor. Meanwhile, in 2010, 67 percent of customers rated the hotel's customer service excellent and good. It can be seen that visitors are starting to like the customer service of the Parkway Hotel, the reason for it is only 4% and 12% of guests have a very poor and poor experience with the hotel's customer service. The main thing that can be observed here is that the customer service is greatly improved in 2010 compared to 2005.
The two pie charts display the outcome of the questionnaire that was
This is a collocation error. You do not need a preposition after 'asked'. Remove it: "asked".
asked to
the visitors about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
of the Parkway Hotel. In the years 2005 and 2010, a similar questionnaire was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to 100 customers.

Beginning with the result in 2005, 45 percent of guests rated the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
satisfactory. The major turning point to the review was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
5 out of 100 guests appreciated excellent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
,
in addition
, 36 percent of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
rated poor and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
poor.

Meanwhile, in 2010, 67 percent of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
rated the hotel's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
excellent and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
. It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that visitors are starting to like the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
of the Parkway Hotel, the reason for it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
4% and 12% of guests have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
poor and poor experience with the hotel's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
service.

The main thing that can
be observed
here is that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
is
greatly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
in 2010 compared to 2005.
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IELTS academic The charts below show the results of a questionnaire that asked visitors to the Parkway Hotel how they rated the hotel's customer service. The same questionnaire was given to 100 guests in the years 2005 and 2010.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
158 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • The charts below show the results of a questionnaire that asked visitors to the Parkway Hotel how they rated the hotel's customer service. The same questionnaire was given to 100 guests in the years 2005 and 2010.