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The charts below show information about consumer decisions regarding mobile phone purchases in two different countries. summarize the infromation by selecting and reporting the main information and making comparisons.

The charts below show information about consumer decisions regarding mobile phone purchases in two different countries. summarize the infromation by selecting and reporting the main information and making comparisons. VE5EA
The given pie charts illustrate information about the predominant features in selling mobile phones. Data are collected by a vote of consumers from two countries. Overall, it can be seen that all citizens from the two nations can ignore brands and pay attention to more prices and designs. At first, half of country A prefers a comfortable price, it had shown 50%, whereas only 9% of country B mentioned price as the most important factor. Furthermore, the second prime percentage pertains to design with 40% in country B. The next noticeable phenomenon is that people of both of them can buy mobile phones with friends recommendations, there is a little difference with 1% between them, it was 33% for A, and 32% for B. Moreover the brand does not play a significant role in nations. Only the percentage of 7 of the consumers highlighted in A country, and 19% of citizens voted from B country.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
pie charts illustrate information about the predominant features in selling mobile phones. Data
are collected
by a vote of consumers from two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
Overall
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that all citizens from the two nations can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
brands and pay attention to more prices and designs.

At
first
, half of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
A prefers a comfortable price, it had shown 50%, whereas
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
9% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
B mentioned price as the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
factor.
Furthermore
, the second prime percentage pertains to design with 40% in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
B. The
next
noticeable phenomenon is that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
of both of them can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
mobile phones with friends recommendations, there is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
difference with 1% between them, it was 33% for A, and 32% for B.
Moreover
the brand does not play a significant role in nations.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Only
the percentage of 7 of the consumers highlighted in A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, and 19% of citizens voted from B
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.

IELTS academic The charts below show information about consumer decisions regarding mobile phone purchases in two different countries. summarize the infromation by selecting and reporting the main information and making comparisons.

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
155 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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