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The charts below activities in free-time enjoyed by men and women

The charts below activities in free-time enjoyed by men and women 1Apky
The data provides information on what hobbies preferred by males and females during their spare time. Overall, it can be seen that both genders had similar interests; nonetheless, those people went for sports more than entertainment in their leisure time. The most popular sport was football in each sex. It accounted for two-fourth of the activities. In the meantime, women liked playing tennis, which was the second most popular sport, more than men, with women surpassing men by 3 per cent. On the other hand, looking at the pie chart, it is noticeable that the entertainment represented smaller proportion compared with sports, which they spent their free-time, by three per cent. The percentage of female, who enjoyed watching movies, was equal to male, and it made up to twelve per cent. Whilst, guys slightly loved listening to music, the least favorite recreation, more than ladies in their break time, and the difference was responsible for 3%.
The data provides information on what hobbies preferred by males and females during their spare time.
Overall
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that both genders had similar interests; nonetheless, those
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
went for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
more than entertainment in their leisure time.

The most popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
was football in each sex. It accounted for two-fourth of the activities. In the meantime, women liked playing tennis, which was the second most popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
, more than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
, with women surpassing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
by 3 per cent.

On the other hand
, looking at the pie chart, it is noticeable that the entertainment represented smaller proportion compared with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
, which they spent their free-time, by three per cent. The percentage of female, who enjoyed watching movies, was equal to male, and it made up to twelve per cent. Whilst, guys
slightly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
listening to music, the least favorite recreation, more than ladies in their break time, and the difference was responsible for 3%.
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IELTS academic The charts below activities in free-time enjoyed by men and women

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
156 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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