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Social media has completely changed the way family and friends communicate with each other

Social media has completely changed the way family and friends communicate with each other lLEXJ
Around us, social media play an important role in our human life. It is considered this kind of form has many advantages on the way of people communicate while some believe that this networking site encourages crimminals. I partly agree with both views because of the development of technology we can stay closer with the world with cheap and efficient communication. Social media sites have affected interpersonal interaction in daily life, especially that online communication tends to replace the traditional one is probably due to some evitable reasons. First of all, these platforms have allowed people to keep in touch with their friends, family, or people who migrated to other countries, they can connected through social media like a Facebook video call. They can contact their companion whenever they want. Secondly, social media are like a bridge for them to share their emotions by blog, posts, . . . or they can experiment with various ways of a close relationship. On the other hand, social media websites may have some hidden dangers. Nowadays, we are addicted to some social websites that may have a bad influence on our physical and psychological health. For instance, some children are curious about their life so they visit some websites that are not safe and that may impact the mentality of that children. Moreover, some hackers may use platforms to rate the information of users To conclude, I believe that the use of social media is good to a certain level but precautions should be taken regarding privacy and security
Around us,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
play an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in our human life. It
is considered
this kind of form has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages on the way of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
communicate while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
believe that this networking site encourages
Possible spelling mistake found.
crimminals
. I partly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with both views
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the development of technology we can stay closer with the world with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
and efficient communication.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
sites have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
interpersonal interaction in daily life,
especially
that online communication tends to replace the traditional one is
probably
due to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Possible spelling mistake found.
evitable
reasons.
This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, these platforms have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
in touch with their friends, family, or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who migrated to other countries, they can
The verb 'can' requires the base form of the verb: "connect"
connected
through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
like a Facebook video call. They can contact their companion whenever they want.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
are like a bridge for them to share their emotions by blog, posts
Did you just mean "," or "."?
, .
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
Use a comma before 'or' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
or
they can experiment with various ways of a close relationship.
On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
websites may have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
hidden
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
dangers
. Nowadays, we
are addicted
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
websites that may have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
influence on our physical and psychological health.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
children are curious about their life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they visit
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
websites that are not safe and that may impact the mentality of that children.
Moreover
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
hackers may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
platforms to rate the information of users
To conclude
, I believe that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
to a certain level
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
precautions should
be taken
regarding privacy and security

IELTS academic Social media has completely changed the way family and friends communicate with each other

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
255 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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