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the chart shows the average daily minimum and maximum level of air pollutants in 4 big cities in 2000 v.2

the chart shows the average daily minimum and maximum level of air pollutants in 4 big cities in 2000 v. 2
The given bar chart gives data about the daily smallest and largest amounts of so2 and n2o which caused pollution in 4 different cities, namely Los Angeles, Calcutta, Beijing and mexico city, in the year 2000. Overall, mexico city was the place most contaminated by the two mentioned pollutants among the four cities. In Los Angeles, the quantity of so2 emitted into the atmosphere was lowest, with the minimum number of 2 micro-grams per m3 and the maximum number five times as much. The levels of n2o emission were much higher with the biggest figure reaching up to more than 100 micro-grams per m3 every day. Meanwhile, the environment in mexico city was severely polluted by so2 and n2o emission with the least of 80 and 113 micro-grams per m3 respectively. Unlike los Angeles and mexico city, in Calcutta and Beijing, the amount of pollution caused by n2o was less that that caused by so2. The maximum figures for so2 emission were 59 micro-grams per m3 in Calcutta and 130 micro-grams per m3 in Beijing while the biggest numbers for n2o in these places were just above 50 micro-grams per m3.
The
given
bar chart gives data about the daily smallest and largest amounts of so2 and n2o which caused pollution in 4
different
cities
,
namely
Los Angeles, Calcutta, Beijing and
mexico city
, in the year 2000.
Overall
,
mexico city
was the place most contaminated by the two mentioned pollutants among the four cities.

In Los Angeles, the quantity of so2 emitted into the atmosphere was lowest, with the minimum number of 2 micro-grams per m3 and the maximum number five times as much. The levels of n2o emission were much higher with the biggest figure reaching up to more than 100 micro-grams per m3 every day. Meanwhile, the environment in
mexico city
was
severely
polluted by so2 and n2o emission with the least of 80 and 113 micro-grams per m3
respectively
.

Unlike
los Angeles
and
mexico city
, in Calcutta and Beijing, the amount of pollution caused by n2o was less that that caused by so2. The maximum figures for so2 emission were 59 micro-grams per m3 in Calcutta and 130 micro-grams per m3 in Beijing while the biggest numbers for n2o in these places were
just
above 50 micro-grams per m3.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
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IELTS academic the chart shows the average daily minimum and maximum level of air pollutants in 4 big cities in 2000 v. 2

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
191 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
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  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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