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The chart compares the propotions of primary-school-age children

The chart compares the propotions of primary-school-age children NwO7j
The chart compares the propotions of primary-school-age children taking part in school between more and less developed regions. In addition, the table illustrates data about the propotions of population spending for the same type of education in six geological divisions. Overall, thankfully, the most children all over the world are enroled in education. Yet, the percentage is higher in more developed regions and countries in transition. Moreove, while there are three different areas where about a quarter of there population pay for education, it's estimated that will have decreased significantly by 2050 except for developed countries, which will soar to extremly high percentag. Around all childrens in developed regions and countries in transition are enroled in education. However, the figure for less developed regions are eight of each ten children. More or less than 25 percent of people in East and South Asia and in developed countries take account of their children' education expenses nowadays. Still, in 2050, the percentages will plunge to extremly insignificant valvues except for developed countries, which will be quadruple at 84 percent. On the other hand, Sub-Sahra Africa and Latin America, which their figures are around 10 percent, will go down to 1 and 5 percent respectively. Finally, despie the very low figures in Arab states, they will have halved by 2050.
The chart compares the
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propotions
of primary-school-age children taking part in school between more and less
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developed
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regions
.
In addition
, the table illustrates data about the
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propotions
of population spending for the same type of
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education
in six geological divisions.

Overall
,
thankfully
, the most children all over the world are
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enroled
in
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education
.
Yet
, the percentage is higher in more
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developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regions
and
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countries
in transition.
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Moreove
, while there are three
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different
areas where about a quarter of there population pay for
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education
, it's estimated that will have decreased
significantly
by 2050
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
except for
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developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, which will soar to
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extremly
high
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percentag
.

Around all
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childrens
in
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developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regions
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
in transition are
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "enrolled", the past tense form of the verb 'enrol'?
enroled
in
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education
.
However
, the figure for less
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developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
regions
are eight of each ten children.

More or less than 25
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percent
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in East and South Asia and in
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developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
take account of their children'
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
expenses nowadays.
Still
, in 2050, the percentages will plunge to
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extremly
insignificant
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valvues
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
except for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
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countries
, which will be quadruple at 84
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percent
.
On the other hand
,
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Sub-Sahra
Africa and Latin America, which their figures are around 10
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percent
, will go down to 1 and 5
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percent
respectively
.
Finally
,
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despie
the
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very
low figures in Arab states, they will have halved by 2050.
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IELTS academic The chart compares the propotions of primary-school-age children

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
217 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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