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The chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities.

The chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities. VW9O
The given bar chart illustrates the proportion of people’s behaviour, buying and drinking coffee and tea in different Australian cities, which included Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Adelaide and Hobart. Overall, it can be seen that all five Australian cities the percentage of people who went to a cafe for having coffee or tea have the highest number, while people who bought fresh coffee have the least number of another 2 habits in the last 4 weeks. According to the charts, it is clear that in Melbourne, Hobart, Sydney and Brisbane have the highest people who went to cafe with the figures bring 64%, 63%, 61% and 55% respectively and in Adelaide is the city with having the least people at about 49% who went to cafe in last 4 weeks. However, the people who bought fresh coffee, having the smallest number of all five cities. In Sydney and Melbourne have similar percentage at around 42 to 44%. The remaining cities which included Hobart, Adelaide and Brisbane have an average number less than 40%, having about 38%, 34% and 33% respectively. Finally, the people who bought instant coffee have a percentage between another 2 behaviours except in Adelaide which more than people bought fresh coffee about 1%.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
bar chart illustrates the proportion of
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people’s
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
, buying and drinking
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coffee
and tea in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
Australian
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cities
, which included Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Adelaide and Hobart.

Overall
, it can be
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seen
that all five Australian
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cities
the percentage of
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people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
went to a
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
for
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having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
or tea have the highest
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number
, while
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people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
have the least
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number
of another 2 habits in the last 4 weeks.

According to the charts, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that in Melbourne, Hobart, Sydney and Brisbane have the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
went to
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
with the figures bring 64%, 63%, 61% and 55%
respectively
and in Adelaide is the city with
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having
the least
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people
at about 49%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
went to
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
in last 4 weeks.
However
, the
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people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
,
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having
the smallest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of all five
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cities
. In Sydney and Melbourne have similar percentage at around 42 to 44%. The remaining
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cities
which included Hobart, Adelaide and Brisbane have an average
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number
less than 40%,
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having
about 38%, 34% and 33%
respectively
.

Finally
, the
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people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
instant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
have a percentage between another 2
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviours' is British English.
behaviours
except in Adelaide which more than
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people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
coffee
about 1%.
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IELTS academic The chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
205 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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