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The chart below shows the percentage of people who ate five portions of fruit and vegetables per day in the UK from 2001 to 2008

The chart below shows the percentage of people who ate five portions of fruit and vegetables per day in the UK from 2001 to 2008 jR9L1
The provided diagram compares the percent of people who consume five parts of fruit and vegetable every day in the United Kingdom between 2001 and 2008As is presented, in this period women's rate was the highest percentage. Moreover, point of men was less lower than women while figure of children increased gradually Percent of female climbed remarkably and grew over 30% in 2006, then showed a few variation. Besides, male's rate improved noticeably and swelled above 25% also in 2006, later remained relatively unchanged. In this period, children’s point experienced a period of stability till 2004, but later recovered to 25%.
The provided diagram compares the percent of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who consume five parts of fruit and vegetable every day in the United Kingdom between 2001 and 2008As
is presented
, in this period women's rate was the highest percentage.
Moreover
, point of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
was
Non-standard use of the comparative or superlative. Did you mean "less low"?
less lower
than women while figure of children increased
gradually
Percent of female climbed
remarkably
and grew over 30% in 2006, then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
a
Possible agreement error. The noun variation seems to be countable; consider using: "few variations".
few variation
.
Besides
, male's rate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
noticeably
and swelled above 25%
also
in 2006, later remained
relatively
unchanged. In this period, children’s point experienced a period of stability till 2004,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
later recovered to 25%.
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IELTS academic The chart below shows the percentage of people who ate five portions of fruit and vegetables per day in the UK from 2001 to 2008

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
101 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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