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The chart below show the value of one country's exports

The chart below show the value of one country's exports R2XdW
The bar chart illustrates the export earnings billions in different group during 2015 and 2016. The table data outlines the proportion change in values in each category of exports in 2015 to 2016. Overall, it is apparently seen that, petroleum and engineered products were main revenue earning in both years. To begin with, petroleum products taken first place main revenue earning which is 60 billions. Then it is slightly increase in 2016 is 63 billions. Also, engineered goods is second profit earning products 55 to 62 billions. similarly, gems and jewellery earn 42 billions in 2015 later in 2016 it is noticable decrease with 40 billions. After that, agricultural products income approximately same in two years which is 32 billions. Moreover, in 2015 textiles export 25 billions but in 2016 textiles profits significantly climbed up 32 billions. From 2015 to 2016, there was a 15. 24% revenue earning hiked from textiles. By the contrast there was almost no change money earned from agricultural product is 0. 8%. Moreover, gems and jewellery product profit decline with 5. 18% and petroleum products and engineered good earning amount rose with 3%, 8. 5% respectively.
The bar chart illustrates the export
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earnings
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billions
in
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different
group during 2015 and 2016. The table data outlines the proportion
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in values in each category of exports in 2015 to 2016.

Overall
, it is
apparently
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that, petroleum and engineered
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products
were main revenue
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earning
in both years.

To
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begin
with, petroleum
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products
taken
first
place main revenue
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earning
which is 60
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billions
. Then it is
slightly
Consider using a past participle here: "increased".
increase
in 2016 is 63
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billions
.
Also
, engineered
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
is second profit
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earning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
55 to 62
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billions
.
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similarly
, gems and
Possible spelling mistake. 'jewellery' is British English.
jewellery
earn 42
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billions
in 2015 later in 2016 it is
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noticable
decrease with 40
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billions
. After that, agricultural
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products
income approximately same in two years which is 32
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billions
.
Moreover
, in 2015 textiles export 25
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billions
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but
in 2016 textiles profits
significantly
climbed up 32 billions.

From 2015 to 2016, there was a 15. 24% revenue
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earning
hiked from textiles. By the contrast there was almost no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
money earned from agricultural
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product
is 0. 8%.
Moreover
, gems and
Possible spelling mistake. 'jewellery' is British English.
jewellery
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product
profit decline with 5. 18% and petroleum
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products
and engineered
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earning
amount rose with 3%, 8. 5%
respectively
.
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IELTS academic The chart below show the value of one country's exports

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
191 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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