Search
Tools
Listening
Reading
1. Academic
2. General
Writing
1. IELTSWriting Checker
2. IELTS Writing Samples
Speaking

Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.

The chart below show the number of Japanese tourists travelled abroad.

The chart below show the number of Japanese tourists travelled abroad. dk6Q6

The bar chart demonstrates the number of people from Japan traveling abroad from there year between 1985 and 1995. Whereas, a line graph shows the percentage of Japanese traveling to Australia in the same period. Overall, the number of Japanese citizens traveling abroad has observed a gradual increase over the years with a slight drop in the year 1991. Similarly, percent of Japanese traveling from Japan to Australia is also increase over the years. In 1985, the number of people who traveled abroad from Japan was around 5 million which gradually start rising in 1990. where tourist count came around 11 million. And Later, saw a slight decrease over the year(in 1991). Again it started to rose till the end of 1995 where it surpassed 14 million tourists that traveled to abroad. While Number of people traveled to Australia from Japan at the start in 1985 were around 20% which observed a slow and steady increase over the years till 1989 where there was a small decrease which later again showed an increase Later, till the end. Where it hits its top with about 60% of Australia's shares of Japan's tourist market.

The bar chart demonstrates the You use this word too often, consider replacing it withsumtotalfigurestatistic
number
 of This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
people
 from You use this word too often, consider replacing it withglazevarnishlacquerstaincoating
Japan
 traveling abroad from there You use this word too often, consider replacing it withperiodbreadthtermmileagespandiameter
year
 between 1985 and 1995. “Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whereas
, a line graph This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :demonstratesportraysindicatesdisplays
shows
 the percentage of Japanese traveling to Australia in the same period.

Overall
, the You use this word too often, consider replacing it withsumtotalfigurestatistic
number
 of Japanese citizens traveling abroad has observed a gradual You use this word too often, consider replacing it withdevelopmentraisemergerhikeriseupsurge
increase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withup
over
 the years with a slight drop in the You use this word too often, consider replacing it withperiodbreadthtermmileagespandiameter
year
 1991. Similarly
, percent of Japanese traveling from You use this word too often, consider replacing it withglazevarnishlacquerstaincoating
Japan
 to Australia is also
Consider using a past participle here: "increased".increased
increase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withup
over
 the years.

In 1985, the You use this word too often, consider replacing it withsumtotalfigurestatistic
number
 of This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
people
 who traveled abroad from You use this word too often, consider replacing it withglazevarnishlacquerstaincoating
Japan
 was around 5 million which gradually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :initiate
start
 rising in 1990. This sentence does not start with an uppercase letterWhere
where
 tourist count came around 11 million. And Later, This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :witnessed
saw
 a slight decrease You use this word too often, consider replacing it withup
over
 the year(in 1991). Again it This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :initiated
started
 to rose till the This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :expiration
end
 of 1995 where it surpassed 14 million tourists that traveled to abroad.

While You use this word too often, consider replacing it withsumtotalfigurestatistic
Number
 of This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
people
 traveled to Australia from You use this word too often, consider replacing it withglazevarnishlacquerstaincoating
Japan
 at the This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :initiate
start
 in 1985 were around 20% which observed a slow and steady You use this word too often, consider replacing it withdevelopmentraisemergerhikeriseupsurge
increase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withup
over
 the years till 1989

where there was a This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:tiny
small
 decrease which later again This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :demonstratedportrayedindicateddisplayed
showed
 an You use this word too often, consider replacing it withdevelopmentraisemergerhikeriseupsurge
increase
 Later, till the This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :expiration
end
. “Where” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Where
 it hits its top with about 60% of Australia's shares of Japan's tourist market. 