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The budget of the UAE for 2022

The budget of the UAE for 2022 OweLd
The pie chart given illustrates the money allocated by the UAE government for different sectors which comprise the budget of the state for 2022. As per the chart, it can be seen the considerate amount of money which was invested in social security (100 billion UAE) as well as 89 billion UAE provided for IT sphere. Agriculture in addition accounts for 78 billion UAE being the most important sector. As seen, the social security takes the biggest part of the chart, with 25% being accounted for. healthcare system however being the smallest sector in terms of allocated money takes the last place among all the sectors. To recapitulate, this chart is comprised of different sectors and we can see very clearly unequal distribution of the money.
The pie
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chart
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
illustrates the
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money
allocated by the UAE
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government
for
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different
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sectors
which comprise the budget of the state for 2022. As per the
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chart
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
the considerate amount of
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money
which
was invested
in social security (100 billion UAE)
as well
as 89 billion UAE provided for IT sphere. Agriculture
in addition
accounts for 78 billion UAE being the most
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important
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sector
. As
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
, the social security takes the biggest part of the
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chart
, with 25%
being accounted
for.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
healthcare
system
however
being the smallest
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sector
in terms of allocated
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money
takes the last place among all the
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sectors
. To recapitulate, this
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chart
Did you mean "comprises" or "consists of" or "is composed of"?
is comprised of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
sectors and
we can
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see
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
clearly
unequal distribution of the
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money
.
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IELTS academic The budget of the UAE for 2022

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
126 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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