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The below pie charts present the reasons for migration to from the uk

The below pie charts present the reasons for migration to from the uk MyGXk
The pie charts compare the number of people immigration to or emigrating from United Kingdom in 2007 it can clearly be seen that data has formal study are popular in immigration member of people it looking for work and definite job are other no reason stated to emigration Overall the United Kingdom has completing employed 30% in 2007 are immigration and 29%to emigration by uk both these reason together recorded more then half of the immigrants while around fifteen percent immigration came with a view to accompanying other and over. 10% for looking for work
The pie charts compare the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
immigration
to or emigrating
A determiner is probably missing here: "from the United Kingdom".
from United Kingdom
in 2007 it can
clearly
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that data has formal study are popular in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
immigration
member of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
it looking for work and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
definite
job are other no reason stated to emigration
Overall
the United Kingdom has completing employed 30% in 2007 are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
immigration
and 29%to emigration by
Possible spelling mistake found.
uk
both these reason together recorded more
Comparison requires "than", not 'then' nor 'as'.
then
half of the immigrants while around fifteen percent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
immigration
came with a view to accompanying other and over. 10% for looking for work
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IELTS academic The below pie charts present the reasons for migration to from the uk

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
94 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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