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The bar graph shows information about survey conducted for the places in which people gain access to the internet from 1998 to 2004

The bar graph shows information about survey conducted for the places in which people gain access to the internet from 1998 to 2004 ENOnM
The bar graph compares the percentage of survey of 4 places where people used internet between 1998 and 2004. Overall, it can be seen that the proportion of Internet users declined at work and college. In addition, home was always the best place to access Internet throughout the period. The rate of internet users grew at home and library. In 1998, roughly 52% of people gained access to the internet at home, while the figure for library was around five times lower. The percentage of people who used internet at home had lost their previous dominance by 2004, when the figure rose slightly to 55%. Regarding library, the number of users reached by 5% in 2000, before remaining the same the last 3 years, at 12%. Interestingly, from 1998to2002 saw no changes in the level of internet users at college to represent exactly 20%. Likewise, access to the internet at work also stood unchanged in the first three years, at just 30%. Finally, in 2004, the least people chose to access to the internet here(10%).
The bar graph compares the percentage of survey of 4 places where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
internet between 1998 and 2004.

Overall
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the proportion of Internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
users
declined at work and college.
In addition
, home was always the best place to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
Internet throughout the period.

The rate of internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
users
grew at home and library. In 1998, roughly 52% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
gained
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
to the internet at home, while the figure for library was around five times lower. The percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
internet at home had lost their previous dominance by 2004, when the figure rose
slightly
to 55%. Regarding library, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
users
reached by 5% in 2000,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
remaining the same the last 3 years, at 12%.

Interestingly
, from 1998to2002
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in the level of internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
users
at college to represent exactly 20%.
Likewise
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
to the internet at work
also
stood unchanged in the
first
three years, at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
30%.
Finally
, in 2004, the least
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
chose to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
to the internet here(10%).
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IELTS academic The bar graph shows information about survey conducted for the places in which people gain access to the internet from 1998 to 2004

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
175 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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