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The bar graph gives information about the share of adults in the United States who use the internet sorted by age groups in the year 2019.

The bar graph gives information about the share of adults in the United States who use the internet sorted by age groups in the year 2019. Ap2Ox
The bar chart reveals data about internet users in the United States percentage-wise, classified by age in 2019. It is noticeable that the proportion of people who surfed the internet declined as they grow older. Overall. the youth recorded the most significant utilization, whereas old aged people hit the low share in the given period. Focusing on the proportion of teenagers involve 18-29 age group internet users made up the highest rare contribution with 100% compared to other groups. There was a mild decline of 3% in the 30-49 age group and levelled at 97% which was slightly fewer consumers than teenagers. In contrast, old people who are in the range of 50-64 years recorded far less percent of internet consumption than adults with 88% share. Meanwhile, in comparison to other groups of people, old aged people who are over 65 contributed the least to internet consumption in 2019. Those who are from 30 to 49 and over 65 years witnessed approximately one-tenth distinction between each other.
The bar chart reveals data about internet users in the United States percentage-wise, classified by age in 2019.

It is noticeable that the proportion of
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people
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who
surfed the internet declined as they grow older.
Overall
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
youth recorded the most significant utilization, whereas
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old
aged
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people
hit the low share in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period.

Focusing on the proportion of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
involve 18-29 age
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group
internet users made up the highest rare contribution with 100% compared to other
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groups
. There was a mild decline of 3% in the 30-49 age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
and levelled at 97% which was
slightly
fewer consumers than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
.
In contrast
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are in the range of 50-64 years recorded far less percent of internet consumption than adults with 88% share.

Meanwhile,
in comparison
to other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
aged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are over 65 contributed the least to internet consumption in 2019. Those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are from 30 to 49 and over 65 years witnessed approximately one-tenth distinction between each other.
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IELTS academic The bar graph gives information about the share of adults in the United States who use the internet sorted by age groups in the year 2019.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
167 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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