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The bar graph below shows change in the four modes of transport: bus, car, bike and foot between the years 1950 and 1990.

The bar graph below shows change in the four modes of transport: bus, car, bike and foot between the years 1950 and 1990. NllPg
Some interesting statistics concerning the proportion of people moving in four means of transport in a particular city in Europe between 1950 and 1990 are vividly depicted in the given bar chart. In a general perspective, it is clear that the tally of people transported by car increased noticeably while other 3 kinds of transport displayed a downward trend. The initial impression from the chart is that the tally of people transport by car witnessed a remarkable change, its figure was the last on the list, with only 5% then the proportion of people using car represented a large majority of the mean of transport in 1990, with 35%, making it twice times as popular as the bus.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
interesting statistics concerning the proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
moving in four means of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
in a particular city in Europe between 1950 and 1990 are
vividly
depicted in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
bar chart.
The usual preposition for "perspective" is "from" not "in." "from a general perspective".
In a general perspective
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the tally of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
transported by car increased
noticeably
while other 3 kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
displayed a downward trend.

The initial impression from the chart is that the tally of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
by car witnessed a remarkable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
, its figure was the last on the list, with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
5% then the proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
using car represented a large majority of the mean of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transport
in 1990, with 35%, making it twice times as popular as the bus.

IELTS academic The bar graph below shows change in the four modes of transport: bus, car, bike and foot between the years 1950 and 1990.

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
118 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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