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The bar charts illustrate the number of honey-bee colonies and the amount of honey produced in the United States between 1970 and 2010.

The bar charts illustrate the number of honey-bee colonies and the amount of honey produced in the United States between 1970 and 2010. EwrRL
The bar charts illustrate the number of honey-bee colonies and the amount of honey produced in the United States between 1970 and 2010. Overall, the quantity of honey-bee hives and their honey production fluctuated differently in the first 20 years, but they both experienced a dramatic decrease over the last 20 years of the period. Firstly, the number of honey-bee colonies reached its peak at about 4. 2 million in 1980, an increase of 0. 2 million from 4 million in 1970. However, over the period of 30 years, the honey-bee population saw a considerable decline of more than a million every 10 years to their lowest point at 1. 7 million in 2010. As for the second chart, between 1970 and 1980, the amount of honey produced fell from 130, 000 tonnes to 110, 000 tonnes. Nevertheless, there was a steady growth in American bees produced by 10, 000 tonnes to 120. 000 tonnes. Honey production went down by 20, 000 tonnes and 30, 000 tonnes, respectively. The year 2010 had the smallest amount of honey production in the US at 70, 000 tonnes.
The bar charts illustrate the number of honey-bee colonies and the amount of honey produced in the United States between 1970 and 2010.
Overall
, the quantity of honey-bee hives and their honey production fluctuated
differently
in the
first
20 years,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they both experienced a dramatic decrease over the last 20 years of the period.
Firstly
, the number of honey-bee colonies reached its peak at about 4. 2
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
in 1980, an increase of 0. 2
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
from 4
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
in 1970.
However
, over the period of 30 years, the honey-bee population
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
a considerable decline of more than a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
every 10 years to their lowest point at 1. 7
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
in 2010. As for the second chart, between 1970 and 1980, the amount of honey produced fell from 130, 000 tonnes to 110, 000 tonnes.
Nevertheless
, there was a steady growth in American bees produced by 10, 000 tonnes to 120. 000 tonnes. Honey production went down by 20, 000 tonnes and 30, 000 tonnes,
respectively
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2010 had the smallest amount of honey production in the US at 70, 000 tonnes.
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IELTS academic The bar charts illustrate the number of honey-bee colonies and the amount of honey produced in the United States between 1970 and 2010.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
185 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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