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The bar charts elucidate the number of males and females working in four nations namely Belgium, the US, Japan and Indonesia who both genders aged 60-64 from 1970 to 2000.

The bar charts elucidate the number of males and females working in four nations namely Belgium, the US, Japan and Indonesia who both genders aged 60-64 from 1970 to 2000. Ow3ey
The bar charts elucidate the number of males and females working in four nations namely Belgium, the US, Japan and Indonesia who both genders aged 60-64 from 1970 to 2000. Overall, it can be noticed that the women showed the highest rates in both years rather than men. To embark with, in 1970, the USA had the highest employment figure with 86% males and 78% females doing jobs, whereas Japan experienced the lowest rate at 76% males and 56% women in 1970. Besides this, Indonesia came in second with 84% and 65% employed men and women respectively. Approximately 79% of boys and 63% of girls were working in Belgium in 1970. Furthermore, in terms of the USA, in 2000, the number of men and women stood at 78% and 45% respectively and it declined by 15% and inclined by 2% both gender in Japan. Indonesia witnessed a decrease in employment among men and women by 10% and 15% in 2000. 27% lesser Belgian men were employed in 2000.
The bar charts elucidate the number of males and females working in four nations
namely
Belgium, the US, Japan and Indonesia who both genders aged 60-64 from 1970 to 2000.

Overall
, it can
be noticed
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
the highest rates in both years
rather
than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
.

To embark with, in 1970, the USA had the highest employment figure with 86% males and 78% females doing jobs, whereas Japan experienced the lowest rate at 76% males and 56%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
in 1970.
Besides
this, Indonesia came in second with 84% and 65% employed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
respectively
. Approximately 79% of boys and 63% of girls were working in Belgium in 1970.

Furthermore
, in terms of the USA, in 2000, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
stood at 78% and 45%
respectively
and it declined by 15% and inclined by 2% both gender in Japan. Indonesia witnessed a decrease in employment among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
by 10% and 15% in 2000. 27% lesser Belgian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
were employed
in 2000.
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IELTS academic The bar charts elucidate the number of males and females working in four nations namely Belgium, the US, Japan and Indonesia who both genders aged 60-64 from 1970 to 2000.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
168 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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Lexical Resource: 5.5
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Grammatical Range: 6.5
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  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
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