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The bar charts compare how many students who were graduated in bachelor, M.s and P.H.D degrees carried on to further study

The bar charts compare how many students who were graduated in bachelor, M. s and P. H. D degrees carried on to further study, took part-time work or voluntary work, and did not employ after graduation in 2004 in the UK. Overall, a significant number of students tended to study at the higher level in both categories, and just a minimal number of them selected voluntary work. According to the first chart, 29. 665 graduate students continued to study after college, and just 3. 500 of them fascinated to work voluntarily. Roughly half of the number of whom to prefer to further study, decided to take part-time work followed by a similar number of others who were unemployed. The second chart reports that the substantial proportion of postgraduates preferred to study further (2. 725) and the quantity of them who worked part-time is more noticeable than others. However, similar to bachelor graduates, the minimum number belonged to the voluntary work category, and similar to the first chart, who did not have an opportunity to take a job reported approximately half of two other considerable categories (part-time work and further study).
The bar
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charts
compare how
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many
students
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who
were graduated
in bachelor, M. s and P. H. D degrees carried on to
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further
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study
,
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took part
-time
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work
or voluntary
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work
, and did not employ after graduation in 2004 in the UK.
Overall
, a significant
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number
of students tended to
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study
at the higher level in both categories, and
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just
a minimal
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number
of them selected voluntary work.

According to the
first
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chart
, 29. 665 graduate students continued to
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study
after college, and
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just
3. 500 of them fascinated to
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work
voluntarily
. Roughly half of the
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number
of whom to prefer to
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further
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study
, decided to
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take part
-time
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work
followed by a similar
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number
of others
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who
were unemployed
.

The second
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chart
reports that the substantial proportion of postgraduates preferred to
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study
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further
(2. 725) and the quantity of them
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who
worked part-time is more noticeable than others.
However
, similar to bachelor graduates, the minimum
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number
belonged to the voluntary
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work
category, and similar to the
first
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chart
,
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who
did not have an opportunity to take a job reported approximately half of two other considerable categories (part-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
further
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study)
.
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IELTS academic The bar charts compare how many students who were graduated in bachelor, M. s and P. H. D degrees carried on to further study

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
190 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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