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The bar chart shows the components of gdp in the Uk from 1992 to 2000.

The bar chart shows the components of gdp in the Uk from 1992 to 2000. mM8n
The bar charts represent data regarding the constituent of gross domestic product in the UK between 1992 and 2000. To sum up, it can be clearly seen that IT industry showed the fluctuations over time. But, the figure of IT industry was increasing in 2000, while the service industry rose in given period of time. By casting a glance, in 1992, above 6% of GDP growth in IT industry, whereas 4% of gross domestic product from service industry in UK. Then, the data was surged up at 8% and around 6% in 1994. In contrast, the GDP of IT industry was observed as 8% in 1996, although the service industry of GDP grew by 1%in same year. Analysing further, in 1995, the percentage of GDP from IT industry was inclined by 2% in 1998, while the figure of service industry rose to approximately 8%. Following this, the maximum IT industry of GDP had significantly increase at above 14% in 2000 as campared to other years. Conversely, in 2000, the proportion of GDP by service industry increased to 8%.
The bar charts represent data regarding the constituent of gross domestic product in the UK between 1992 and 2000. To sum up, it can be
clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that IT
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
the fluctuations over time.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, the figure of IT
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
was increasing in 2000, while the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
rose in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period of time. By casting a glance, in 1992, above 6% of GDP growth in IT
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
, whereas 4% of gross domestic product from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
in UK. Then, the data
was surged
up at 8% and around 6% in 1994.
In contrast
, the GDP of IT
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
was observed
as 8% in 1996, although the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
of GDP grew by 1%in same year.
Possible spelling mistake. 'Analysing' is British English.
Analysing
further
, in 1995, the percentage of GDP from IT
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
was inclined
by 2% in 1998, while the figure of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
rose to approximately 8%. Following this, the maximum IT
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
of GDP had
significantly
Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: "increased".
increase
at above 14% in 2000 as
Possible spelling mistake found.
campared
to other years.
Conversely
, in 2000, the proportion of GDP by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
industry
increased to 8%.
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IELTS academic The bar chart shows the components of gdp in the Uk from 1992 to 2000.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
178 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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