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The bar chart show that average of carbon emissions in different countries.

The bar chart show that average of carbon emissions in different countries. e3EKG
The line chart illustrates that average of carbon dioxide ( co2) emissions per person in the United kingdom, Sweden, Italy and Portugal from 1967 to 2007. The data has calibrated in metric tonnes. Overall, it is clear that, the highest metric tones was recorded in United kingdom. While the lowest tonnes was observed a carbon emission in Portugal. To commence with, to used a co2 by per person in United kingdom is highest statistic of metric tonnes in year 1967 nearly 11 tonnes. Until, the next year is rapidly declined to still 2007 around 7 tonnes. In Sweden is show a up and down figure to average of carbon emission by per individuals. The 1967 co2 emission is approximately 9 tonnes and next year was sharply increase that was 10 tonnes. Then, rapidly decline to till 2007 which was 5 tonnes. Furthermore, In Italy, use a carbon emission in the year 1967 sharply incline to till 1977 that was 6 tonnes. In fact, 2007 was remain constant about 7 tonnes. In addition, Portugal was rapidly increase to 1997 which was five tonnes. In the early period, was attached the figure of Sweden region.
The line chart illustrates that average of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carbon
dioxide
Don't put a space after the opening parenthesis
(
co2)
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emissions
per person in the
The proper noun "United Kingdom" needs to be capitalized.
United kingdom
, Sweden, Italy and Portugal from 1967 to 2007. The data has calibrated in metric tonnes.
Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that, the highest metric tones
was recorded
in
The proper noun "United Kingdom" needs to be capitalized.
United kingdom
.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
the lowest tonnes
was observed
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carbon
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emission
in Portugal. To commence with, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
a co2 by per person in
The proper noun "United Kingdom" needs to be capitalized.
United kingdom
is
A determiner is probably missing here: "the highest".
highest
statistic of metric tonnes in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1967
nearly
11 tonnes.
“Until” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Until
, the
next
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
is
rapidly
declined to
still
2007 around 7 tonnes. In Sweden is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
up and down figure to average of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carbon
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emission
by per individuals. The 1967 co2
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emission
is approximately 9 tonnes and
next
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
was
sharply
increase that was 10 tonnes. Then,
rapidly
decline to till 2007 which was 5 tonnes.
Furthermore
, In Italy,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
carbon
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
emission
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1967
sharply
incline to till 1977 that was 6 tonnes. In fact, 2007 was
Consider using a past participle here: "remained".
remain
constant about 7 tonnes.
In addition
, Portugal was
rapidly
Consider using a past participle here: "increased".
increase
to 1997 which was five tonnes.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
the early period,
was attached
the figure of Sweden region.
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IELTS academic The bar chart show that average of carbon emissions in different countries.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
193 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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