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The bar chart illustrates the percentage of teenagers in higher education in four various countries namely A, B, C, and D in 2000, 2005 and 2010.

The bar chart illustrates the percentage of teenagers in higher education in four various countries namely A, B, C, and D in 2000, 2005 and 2010. Jomg5
The bar chart illustrates the percentage of teenagers in higher education in four various countries namely A, B, C, and D in 2000, 2005 and 2010. Overall, the percentage of the young individual increased steadily in the country A and D whereas it almost stayed at the same level in the country B and C from 2000 to 2010. In addition, the percentage of pupils was the highest in Country D in the given period. In terms of Country A, the percentage of the teenager who studies in the higher education was 38% in 2000 and it rose significantly to 52% in 2005. 10 years later, in 2010, this showed only a 10% growth to 62%. On the other hand, in the country D, the percentage of students in higher education rose considerably from 64% to 78% from 2000 to 2005 and it observed only a very slight increase of about a mere 2% to 80 % 5 years later. With regards to the country B and C, the percentage of young people was 46% in 2000. While it decreased to 41%, which was the only a decrease among the all countries, in 2005 and then slightly increased to 43 % in 2010 in the country B, this went up 52% in 2005 and there was no change in 2010.
The bar chart illustrates the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
in higher education in four various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
namely
A, B, C, and D in 2000, 2005 and 2010.

Overall
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of the young individual increased
steadily
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
A and D whereas it almost stayed at the same level in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
B and C from 2000 to 2010.
In addition
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of pupils was the highest in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Country
D in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period.

In terms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Country
A, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenager
who studies in the higher education was 38% in 2000 and it rose
significantly
to 52% in 2005. 10 years later, in 2010, this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a 10% growth to 62%.
On the other hand
, in the
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country
D, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of students in higher education rose
considerably
from 64% to 78% from 2000 to 2005 and it observed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
slight increase of about a mere 2% to 80 % 5 years later.

Use "in regard to", "with regard to", or more simply "regarding".
With regards to
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
B and C, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
was 46% in 2000. While it decreased to 41%, which was the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a decrease among the all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, in 2005 and then
slightly
increased to 43 % in 2010 in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
B, this went up 52% in 2005 and there was no
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in 2010.
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IELTS academic The bar chart illustrates the percentage of teenagers in higher education in four various countries namely A, B, C, and D in 2000, 2005 and 2010.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
220 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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