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The bar chart illustrates how much time spent for telephone calls in the UK dividing into three forms between 1995 and 2002.Units are measured in billions.

The bar chart illustrates how much time spent for telephone calls in the UK dividing into three forms between 1995 and 2002. Units are measured in billions. QRp3b
Overall, there were more calls in local type in all years in the given period. The national and international and mobile calls adhered to the same trend but the first one was in higher figures by an order of magnitude. In 1995, the local calls were around 72, which increased slightly reaching 90 and being the peak of call minutes over the period given. In later years, the amount of minutes in local calls reduced to approximately five in the next two years. In 2002, the total amount of local calls returned to the same rate as the initial year of the period. In the next two categories, which are national and international and mobile calls, there was the same upward trend. Although, there was a significant difference in total minutes between them. The first type of call was about 38 in 1995 while the latter was 2 and increased in small increments reaching to 60 at the end of given period. At the beginning of the period the total amount of minutes for mobiles was in small rates. It was transpired the increases in tiny numbers by 1999. After reaching 12, the mobile calls doubled in the next year with approximately 24. In 2002, the gap between mobiles and other two types of calls shortened significantly compared to the first year in the period.
Overall
, there were more
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calls
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
type in all years in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
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period
. The national and international and mobile
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calls
adhered to the same trend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the
first
one was in higher figures by an order of magnitude.

In 1995, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
were around 72, which increased
slightly
reaching 90 and being the peak of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
call
minutes over the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
period
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
. In later years, the amount of minutes in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
to approximately five in the
next
two years.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
2002, the total amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
returned to the same rate as the initial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
of the period.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
In
the
next
two categories, which are national and international and mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
, there was the same upward trend.
“Although” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Although
, there was a significant difference in total minutes between them. The
first
type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
call
was about 38 in 1995 while the latter was 2 and increased in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
increments reaching to 60 at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
period
. At the beginning of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
period
the total amount of minutes for mobiles was in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
rates. It
was transpired
the increases in tiny numbers by 1999. After reaching 12, the mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
doubled in the
next
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
with approximately 24. In 2002, the gap between mobiles and other two types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
shortened
significantly
compared to the
first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
period
.
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IELTS academic The bar chart illustrates how much time spent for telephone calls in the UK dividing into three forms between 1995 and 2002. Units are measured in billions.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
225 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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