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The bar chart compares the proportion of Americans who had meals at fast food eateries in three separate years (2003, 2006 and 2013).

The bar chart compares the proportion of Americans who had meals at fast food eateries in three separate years (2003, 2006 and 2013). PMny2
In 2003 and 2006, more than one third of Americans ate at fast food restaurants once a week, but the number decreased to around 27% in 2013. The proportion of Americans consuming fast food once or twice a month declined by 5% during the first three years before rising to 33% in 2013. The proportion of people who had fast food as a meal several times a week fluctuated at around 16% to 20%, and these percentages were slightly higher than the figures for those eating this food a few times a year. Daily eaters and those who had never eaten in fast food establishments before accounted for very small percentages, ranging from just 3% to 5%.
In 2003 and 2006, more than one third of Americans ate at
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fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
restaurants once a week,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the number decreased to around 27% in 2013. The proportion of Americans consuming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
once or twice a month declined by 5% during the
first
three years
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before
rising to 33% in 2013.

The proportion of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who had
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fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
as a meal several times a week fluctuated at around 16% to 20%, and these percentages were
slightly
higher than the figures for those eating this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
a few times a year. Daily eaters and those who had never eaten in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
establishments
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
accounted for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
percentages, ranging from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
3% to 5%.

IELTS academic The bar chart compares the proportion of Americans who had meals at fast food eateries in three separate years (2003, 2006 and 2013).

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
117 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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