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The bar chart compares the allocation of various income categories of Australian and overseas born men aged between 25 and 44 in Sydney.

The bar chart compares the allocation of various income categories of Australian and overseas born men aged between 25 and 44 in Sydney. weVVn
The bar chart compares the allocation of various income categories of Australian and overseas born men aged between 25 and 44 in Sydney. Overall, it can be clearly seen that the highest proportion of the middle and high income men were born in Australia, whereas men who were born in foreign land have the highest proportion of low Australian-born men have the highest proportion of men in middle income group as compare to other income groups, accounting for approximately 35%, which is more by around 7% of same income group of men born in foreign land. Similarly, men who were not born in their native country consist of one third of the percentage (33%) of the total in the lower middle group, which is slightly(3%) more than the lower middle group of Australian-born men. In contrast, the least percentage of Australian-born men are in low income group, consisting only 14% that is almost one third less of low income group (around 22%)of non-native born men. Likewise, non-native born men have only 15% in high income group, almost one fourth less than that of Australian-born men of high income group(20%)The bar chart compares the allocation of various income categories of Australian and overseas born men aged between 25 and 44 in Sydney. Overall, it can be clearly seen that the highest proportion of the middle and high income men were born in Australia, whereas men who were born in foreign land have the highest proportion of low Australian-born men have the highest proportion of men in middle income group as compare to other income groups, accounting for approximately 35%, which is more by around 7% of same income group of men born in foreign land. Similarly, men who were not born in their native country consist of one third of the percentage (33%) of the total in the lower middle group, which is slightly(3%) more than the lower middle group of Australian-born men. In contrast, the least percentage of Australian-born men are in low income group, consisting only 14% that is almost one third less of low income group (around 22%)of non-native born men. Likewise, non-native born men have only 15% in high income group, almost one fourth less than that of Australian-born men of high income group(20%)
The bar chart
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compares
the allocation of various
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income
categories of Australian and overseas born
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men
aged between 25 and 44 in Sydney.
Overall
, it can be
clearly
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seen
that the highest
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proportion
of the
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middle
and
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high
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income
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men
were born
in Australia, whereas
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men
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who
were born
in
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foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
have the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
of low

Australian-born
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men
have the highest
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proportion
of
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men
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
middle
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
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group
as
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compare
to other
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income
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groups
, accounting for approximately 35%, which is more by
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around
7% of same
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income
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group
of
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men
born in
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foreign
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land
.
Similarly
,
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men
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who
were not born in their native country consist of one third of the
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percentage
(33%) of the total in the lower
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middle
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group
, which is
slightly
(3%) more than the lower
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middle
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group
of Australian-born
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
.

In contrast
, the least
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percentage
of Australian-born
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men
are in
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low
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
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group
, consisting
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only
14%
that is
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almost
one third
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less
of
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low
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income
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group
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(around
22%)of
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non-native
born
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men
.
Likewise
,
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non-native
born
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men
have
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only
15% in
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high
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income
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group
,
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almost
one fourth
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less
than that of Australian-born
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men
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
group(20%)The bar chart
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
compares
the allocation of various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
categories of Australian and overseas born
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
aged between 25 and 44 in Sydney.
Overall
, it can be
clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
middle
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
were born
in Australia, whereas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
were born
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
have the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
of low

Australian-born
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
have the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
middle
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
as
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compare
to other
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income
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groups
, accounting for approximately 35%, which is more by
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around
7% of same
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income
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
born in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
.
Similarly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
were not born in their native country consist of one third of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
(33%) of the total in the lower
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
middle
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
, which is
slightly
(3%) more than the lower
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
middle
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
of Australian-born
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
.

In contrast
, the least
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of Australian-born
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
are in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
low
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
, consisting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
14%
that is
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almost
one third
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
of
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low
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
(around
22%)of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
non-native
born
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
.
Likewise
,
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non-native
born
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
15% in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
almost
one fourth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
less
than that of Australian-born
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
income
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group(20%)
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IELTS academic The bar chart compares the allocation of various income categories of Australian and overseas born men aged between 25 and 44 in Sydney.

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
376 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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