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The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricty in 2014

The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricty in 2014 PNMp
The illustrated bar graph below gives the information on producing and consuming of electricity in top ten countries in 2014. Overall, China has the highest production and consumption of electricity in 2014 in contrast with Korea republic which landed the least ranked for consuming and producing of electricity on the same year. To begin with, China and United States has the majority consumption and production of electricity with 5, 398 billion kWh was produced in 2014 wherein 5322 billion kWh was consumed also on the same year in China followed by United states with the production of 4099 billion kWh and 3866 billion kWh consumption. However, Russia, Japan and India has the similar ranging power production with 1, 057, 936. 2, 871 billion kWh, respectively while their consumption were 1038, 856. 7, 698. 8 billion kWh, chronologically. Furthermore, France, Brazil, Germany and Korea republic has similar quantity for producing and consuming of electricity in 2014. Moreover, Most of the countries has the highest production and consumption of electricity except Germany which has more usage of electricity than of produced.
The illustrated bar graph below gives the information on producing and consuming of
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electricity
in top ten countries in 2014.

Overall
, China has the highest
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production
and
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consumption
of
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electricity
in 2014
in contrast
with Korea republic which landed the least ranked for consuming and producing of
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electricity
on the same year.

To
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begin
with, China and United States has the majority
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consumption
and
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production
of
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electricity
with 5, 398
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billion
kWh
was produced
in 2014 wherein 5322
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billion
kWh
was consumed
also
on the same year in China followed by
The proper noun "United States" needs to be capitalized.
United states
with the
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production
of 4099
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billion
kWh and 3866
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
kWh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumption
.
However
, Russia, Japan and India has the similar ranging power
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production
with 1, 057, 936. 2, 871
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billion
kWh,
respectively
while their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumption
were 1038, 856. 7, 698. 8
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
kWh,
chronologically
.

Furthermore
, France, Brazil, Germany and Korea republic has similar quantity for producing and consuming of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electricity
in 2014.
Moreover
, Most of the countries has the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumption
of
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electricity
except Germany which has more usage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electricity
than of produced.
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IELTS academic The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricty in 2014

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
179 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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