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The bar chart below shows the sales of trousers for two brands in Turkey from 2009 to 2020. The pie chart shows the projected market share of the two brands in trousers in 2020. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the sales of trousers for two brands in Turkey from 2009 to 2020. The pie chart shows the projected market share of the two brands in trousers in 2020. rLb72
The bar chart compares the sales of trousers in thousands of pairs for two different brands in Japan between 2009 and 2020 while the proportions of the market share in HM, Uniqlo, and the others at the end of the same period are showed through the pie chart. Overall, it is clear that HM's sales will be higher than Uniqlo's in the most years from 2009 to 2020 except 2015 and 2016. Meanwhile, others' market share is the largest one among all. In the bar chart, it is certain that the sales of these two fashion brands always differ from each other. Starting from 120, 000 pairs in 2009, the number of Uniqlo’ sales decreased slightly to 100, 000 pairs in 2010 before rising steadily to 200, 000 in 2013. In the 6 years later, there was a substantially high rise in the figure for the sales, reaching 500, 000 pairs before peaking at 600, 000 pair in 2020. Similarly, HM brand had a climb at the same period as Uniqlo. Its figure dropped dramatically by 200, 000 pairs in 2010 but then went up dramatically in the following years, reaching a hefty 550, 000 pairs in 2019 and 2020 was also the year that sold the most pants of this brand with the total number of pants sold in the year is nearly 900, 000 pairs, a pretty impressive number. And the last year is also 2020, the pie chart shows us that the market share of HM alone is almost equal to the total of other brands, only less than 5%, and HM is 35%. followed by Uniqlo with a 25% sales percentage, 10% less than HM and 15% less than all other brands. And we see there is always a connection between the two graphs, they always prove that HM's pants sales are always superior to Uniqlo's.
The bar chart compares the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
of trousers in thousands of
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pairs
for two
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
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brands
in Japan between 2009 and 2020 while the proportions of the market share in HM, Uniqlo, and the others at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the same period are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
through the pie chart.

Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that HM's
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sales
will be higher than Uniqlo's in the most years from 2009 to 2020 except 2015 and 2016. Meanwhile, others' market share is the largest one among all.

In the bar chart, it is certain that the
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sales
of these two fashion
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brands
always differ from each
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other
. Starting from 120, 000
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pairs
in 2009, the number of Uniqlo’
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sales
decreased
slightly
to 100, 000
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pairs
in 2010
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before
rising
steadily
to 200, 000 in 2013. In the 6 years later, there was a
substantially
high rise in the figure for the
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sales
, reaching 500, 000
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pairs
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
peaking at 600, 000
Possible agreement error. The noun 'pair' seems to be countable, so consider using: "pairs".
pair
in 2020.
Similarly
, HM
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brand
had a climb at the same period as Uniqlo. Its figure dropped
dramatically
by 200, 000
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pairs
in 2010
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but
then went up
dramatically
in the following years, reaching a hefty 550, 000
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pairs
in 2019 and 2020 was
also
the
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year
that sold the most pants of this
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brand
with the total number of pants sold in the
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year
is
nearly
900, 000
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pairs
, a pretty impressive number.

And the last
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year
is
also
2020, the pie chart
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
us that the market share of HM alone is almost equal to the total of
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other
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brands
,
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only
less than 5%, and HM is 35%.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
followed
by Uniqlo with a 25%
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sales
percentage, 10% less than HM and 15% less than all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
brands
. And we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
there is always a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
connection between
the two graphs, they always prove that HM's pants
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
are always superior to Uniqlo's.
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IELTS academic The bar chart below shows the sales of trousers for two brands in Turkey from 2009 to 2020. The pie chart shows the projected market share of the two brands in trousers in 2020.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
310 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • The bar chart below shows the sales of trousers for two brands in Turkey from 2009 to 2020. The pie chart shows the projected market share of the two brands in trousers in 2020. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.