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The bar chart below shows shares of expenditures for five major categories in the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom, and Japan in the year 2009.Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows shares of expenditures for five major categories in the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom, and Japan in the year 2009. 57wD
The bar chart compares how consumers in the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom, and Japan allocated different shares of total spending to categories such as food, housing, and transportation in 2009. Overall, it is clear that maximum proportion of budget was allocated on housing by all the given four nations. While least money was spent on health care by these countries except USA in which clothing area got least preference. To begin with, the United States had the highest housing expenditure share, 26% of total expenditures in 2009. The United Kingdom and Japan followed, with 24% and 22%, respectively. Canada had the lowest housing share at 21%. Housing was the largest expenditure component in all countries except Japan. By contrast, Canada had the largest transportation share of all four countries at 20%. The United States and the United Kingdom had the next-highest transportation shares, 17% and 15%, respectively. Japan had the lowest, at 10%. Further analyzing the graph, in Japan, consumers spent 23% of their total expenditures on food in 2009. The United Kingdom had the second-highest share at 20%. Canada, with 15%, and the United States, with 14% had the lowest food expenditure shares among the countries studied. The least figures were seen in case of health care where Canada and Japan spent equal proportion of their money (4%) each and mere 1% was allocated by United Kingdom which was minimum among all given countries.
The bar chart compares how consumers in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
United
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
States
, Canada, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
United
Kingdom, and
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Japan
allocated
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shares
of total spending to categories such as food, housing, and transportation in 2009.

Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that maximum proportion of budget
was allocated
on housing by all the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
four nations.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
least money
was spent
on health care by these
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countries
A determiner is probably missing here: "except the USA".
except USA
in which clothing area
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
A determiner is probably missing here: "the least".
least
preference.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
United
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
States
had the highest housing
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expenditure
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share
, 26% of total
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expenditures
in 2009. The
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United
Kingdom and
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Japan
followed, with 24% and 22%,
respectively
. Canada had the lowest housing
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share
at 21%. Housing was the largest
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expenditure
component in all
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countries
except
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Japan
. By contrast, Canada had the largest transportation
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share
of all four
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countries
at 20%. The
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United
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
States
and the
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United
Kingdom had the
next
-highest transportation
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shares
, 17% and 15%,
respectively
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Japan
had the lowest, at 10%.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Further
analyzing the graph, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Japan
, consumers spent 23% of their total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
expenditures
on food in 2009. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
United
Kingdom had the second-highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
share
at 20%. Canada, with 15%, and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
United
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
States
, with 14% had the lowest food
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expenditure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shares
among the
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countries
studied. The least figures were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in case of health care where Canada and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Japan
spent equal proportion of their money (4%) each and mere 1%
was allocated
by
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United
Kingdom which was minimum among all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
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IELTS academic The bar chart below shows shares of expenditures for five major categories in the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom, and Japan in the year 2009.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
237 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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