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the amount of money spent on book in Germany, France, Italy and Austria between 1995 and 2005. compared

the amount of money spent on book in Germany, France, Italy and Austria between 1995 and 2005. compared k57RK
The given diagram illustrates how much money people spent on books in four different countries, namely Germany, France, Italy and Austria over a period of 10 years, starting from 1995. Overall, it is obvious that the number of money spent on book in all mentioned countries saw an upward trend over the period shown. Moreover, the figure for Germany was highest. In 1995, the amount of money spent on books in Germany was expected to be about 80million. The figures for France, Italy and Austria were likely to be lower, at about 55, 50 and 30 million respectively. It can be seen that the amount of money spent on books in all countries rose gradually. Although the money for books in Germany, Italy, Austria continuously grow in 1999, money in books purchasing in Italy had a rapid fall in 1999 from 55 million to 50 million. The proportion of people buying book in Germany has a considerable decrease about 5 million from 1999 to 2003 and it now stands at 95 million in 2005. France and Italy showed data approximately similar at the beginning and both touched its peaked by the year 2005 around 50-75 million. In addition, Austria went up dramatically starting 2001 to 2005 and reached significantly to high of 65 million. To sum up, the more money purchase on books, the more knowledgeable people was. And it will makes a gorgeous world with incredible things.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
diagram illustrates how much
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money
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
in four
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
countries,
namely
Germany, France, Italy and Austria over a period of 10 years, starting from 1995.
Overall
, it is obvious that the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
in all mentioned countries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
an upward trend over the period shown.
Moreover
, the figure for Germany was highest.

In 1995, the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
in Germany was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to be about
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80million
. The figures for France, Italy and Austria were likely to be lower, at about 55, 50 and 30
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million
respectively
. It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
spent
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
in all countries rose
gradually
. Although the
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money
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
in Germany, Italy, Austria
continuously
grow in 1999,
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money
in
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books
purchasing in Italy had a rapid fall in 1999 from 55
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million
to 50 million.

The proportion of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
buying
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book
in Germany has a considerable decrease about 5
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million
from 1999 to 2003 and it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
stands at 95
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
in 2005. France and Italy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
data approximately similar at the beginning and both touched its peaked by the year 2005 around 50-75
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
.
In addition
, Austria went up
dramatically
starting 2001 to 2005 and reached
significantly
to high of 65 million.

To sum up, the more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
, the more knowledgeable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
was. And it will
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "make"
makes
a gorgeous world with incredible things.
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IELTS academic the amount of money spent on book in Germany, France, Italy and Austria between 1995 and 2005. compared

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
238 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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