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Tha graph gives information about the three most commonly purchased item in a particular bakery in the year for 2014

The graph shows the value of sales of popular baked goods in an individual bakery in 2014. Overall bread and buns appear to have been more profitable then pies but the sales of buns ended the period in steep decline, ending up even below pie sales. In January sales of bread were valued at $80000 but this figure fell to around $45000 in March and fluctuated between $40000 and $65000 until September. The last quarter, however, saw a jump in the value of bread sales to finish where it was at the beginning of the year. The sales of buns followed quite a different pattern. In January, bin sales stood at $40000 but quickly rose to $70000 in may and remained stable until August, after which they plunged to just $30000 in December. The value of pies sold slowly increased from $10000 in January to reach $20000 in August. Sales then levelled off but went up sharply in the last two months of the year to close just ahead of buns at $40000. pies were the only item where sales figures in December exceeded those in January.
The graph
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shows
the value of
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sales
of popular baked
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
in an individual bakery in 2014.
Overall
bread and
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buns
appear to have been more profitable then pies
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but
the
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sales
of
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buns
ended the period in steep decline, ending up even below pie
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sales
. In January
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sales
of bread
were valued
at $80000
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but
this figure fell to around $45000 in March and fluctuated between $40000 and $65000 until September. The last quarter,
however
,
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saw
a jump in the value of bread
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sales
to finish where it was at the beginning of the year. The
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sales
of
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buns
followed quite a
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different
pattern. In January, bin
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sales
stood at $40000
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but
quickly
rose to $70000 in may and remained stable until August, after which they plunged to
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just
$30000 in December. The value of pies sold
slowly
increased from $10000 in January to reach $20000 in August.
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Sales
then levelled off
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but
went up
sharply
in the last two months of the year to close
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just
ahead of
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buns
at $40000. pies were the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
item where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
figures in December exceeded those in January.

IELTS academic Tha graph gives information about the three most commonly purchased item in a particular bakery in the year for 2014

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
187 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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