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Task 1 : The pie charts below describe the electric energy production a major source of energy in the US. Write a short report for a university lecturer describing the information in the charts

Task 1: The pie charts below describe the electric energy production a major source of energy in the US. Write a short report for a university lecturer describing the information in the charts YLkmm
The two pie charts reveal the ratio of the five particular types of electric energy production in the United State in 1970 and 1980. At the onset, it is apparently seen that the ratio of coal and nuclear grew markedly whereas others declined. Now, turning to the details: Coal occupied the highest percentage of the electiric energy production in five major sources of energy during these ten years: rising from 47 % in 1970 to 51 % in 1980. The ratio of hydro in 1980 was three quarters times as high as that of hydro in 1970 (12 % compared with 16 %). The percentages of oil in 1970 and 1980 were roughly similar, 12 % and 11 % respectively. Conversely, there was a considerable growth in the percentage of nuclear from 1970 to 1980, increasing from 1% to 11%. Natural gas also experienced a gradual fall in the proportion of the eclectric energy production, from 24 % in 1970 to 15 % in 1980.
The two pie charts reveal the ratio of the five particular types of electric
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
production in the United State in 1970 and 1980.

At the onset, it is
apparently
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the ratio of coal and nuclear grew
markedly
whereas others declined.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
, turning to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
: Coal occupied the highest percentage of the
Possible spelling mistake found.
electiric
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
production in five major sources of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
during these ten years: rising from 47 % in 1970 to 51 % in 1980. The ratio of hydro in 1980 was three quarters times as high as that of hydro in 1970 (12 % compared with 16 %). The percentages of oil in 1970 and 1980 were roughly similar, 12 % and 11 %
respectively
.
Conversely
, there was a considerable growth in the percentage of nuclear from 1970 to 1980, increasing from 1% to 11%. Natural gas
also
experienced a gradual fall in the proportion of the
Possible spelling mistake found.
eclectric
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
production, from 24 % in 1970 to 15 % in 1980.
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IELTS academic Task 1: The pie charts below describe the electric energy production a major source of energy in the US. Write a short report for a university lecturer describing the information in the charts

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
165 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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