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spending on four categories and global population

spending on four categories and global population Orkpd
The supplied pie charts provide data on the expenditure on main categories globally as well as the distribution of the world population across continents. Overall, it is clear that food makes up the largest proportion of spending worldwide and more than a half of the world’s population live in Asia. We can see that expenditure on food makes up just under a quarter of the total globally, which can be considered as the largest proportion. In contrast, the least amount of money, 6%, id spent on clothing. Housing and transport account for 12% and 18% of the total share and the remaining two fifth of the money is spent on other unspecified categories. 57% of the world’s population live in Asia, while Europe and Americas share 14% of the total each.
The supplied pie charts provide data on the expenditure on main categories globally
as well
as the distribution of the world population across continents.

Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that food
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
up the largest proportion of spending worldwide and more than a half of the world’s population
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in Asia.

We can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that expenditure on food
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
up
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
under a quarter of the total globally, which can
be considered
as the largest proportion.
In contrast
, the least amount of money, 6%, id spent on clothing. Housing and transport account for 12% and 18% of the total share and the remaining two fifth of the money
is spent
on other unspecified categories.

57% of the world’s population
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in Asia, while Europe and Americas share 14% of the total each.
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IELTS academic spending on four categories and global population

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
131 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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