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ridership of four separate transportation forms in a European metropolitan

ridership of four separate transportation forms in a European metropolitan kW1jR
The chart illustrates the number of commuters using subway, tram, bus or bike share in the past 40 years and gives predictions for the nearest 10 years. Generally, all the transportation forms except for bus are becoming more popular. Initially, the interest in all types of transportation remained more or less the same, with subway being the most popular and tram being the least popular. From 1990 till now, the number of tram and subway users has been growing. In contrast, the usage of bus has been slowly diminishing. In 2000, a new transportation system – bike share appeared. Initially, the number of its users was small (about 250000), but after 20 years managed to double. In the nearest 10 years tram and subway usage will rise even faster. It is predicted, that the numbers will reach 4. 5 million and 2 million for subway and the bus respectively. As far as buses are concerned, the decrease will become more sharp, reaching under 1 million commuters in 2030.
The chart illustrates the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of commuters using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subway
, tram, bus or bike share in the past 40 years and gives predictions for the nearest 10 years.

Generally
, all the transportation forms
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
except for
bus are becoming more popular.

Initially
, the interest in all types of transportation remained more or less the same, with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subway
being the most popular and tram being the least popular. From 1990 till
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of tram and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subway
users has been growing.
In contrast
, the usage of bus has been
slowly
diminishing.

In 2000, a new transportation system
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
bike share appeared.
Initially
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of its users was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
(about 250000),
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
after 20 years managed to double.

In the nearest 10 years tram and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subway
usage will rise even faster. It
is predicted
, that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
numbers
will reach 4. 5 million and 2 million for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subway
and the bus
respectively
. As far as buses
are concerned
, the decrease will become more sharp, reaching under 1 million commuters in 2030.
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IELTS academic ridership of four separate transportation forms in a European metropolitan

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
168 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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