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Population of Alain city

Population of Alain city 06aen
This graph show the number of population between 1990 to 2000 in the Alain city. It is clear from the graph that there are a lot of people who born in 1996. According to what is shown on the graph, the less number of population in the Alain is close to 1992. To compere we can see the number in 1997 and 1999 are equal. Then, the highest number in the 1998 it reached to 50000. While, there are no differences in the 1990 and 1991, in the 1991 it decreases from 1990 for 1000. Moreover, the population when increases they have benefits things and bad things. For instance, when they come over capacity the disease will increase. To sum up, we could say that the highest number in the 1996 it is close to 50000, and the less number in 1992 as well as the number was 1000.
This graph
Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: "shows".
show
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of population
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 1990 and 2000".
between 1990 to 2000
in the Alain city. It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
from the graph that there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who born in 1996. According to what
is shown
on the graph, the less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of population in the Alain is close to 1992. To
Did you mean the verb "compare" or the noun "compère" (master of ceremonies)?
compere
we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
in 1997 and 1999 are equal. Then, the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
in the 1998 it reached to 50000. While, there are no differences in the 1990 and 1991, in the 1991 it decreases
Nonstandard phrase. Did you mean: "from 1990 to 1000"?
from 1990 for 1000
.
Moreover
, the population when increases they have benefits things and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
things.
For instance
, when they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
over capacity the disease will increase.

To sum up, we could say that the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
in the 1996 it is close to 50000, and the less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
in 1992
as well
as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
was 1000.

IELTS academic Population of Alain city

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
149 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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