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Pie chart bellow give information about the house hold expenditures of an average vs family in different years. summarizes the information by selecting and reporting the main features

Pie chart bellow give information about the house hold expenditures of an average vs family in different years. summarizes the information by selecting and reporting the main features 7a0Xy

In 1970, about a quarter of the household expenses were spent in mortgages, where as It was doubled and half of all expenses in 2004. The family spent 1% of income for child care in 1970 however, It was raising as 10% of their income in 2004. There is a unchanged data that was observed expenses of entertainment in both years. The expenses of food and transport were decreasing percentage with respect to 25% to 12% and 13% to 5% from 1970 to 2004

In 1970, about a quarter of the household expenses were spent
 in mortgages, Did you mean "whereas"?whereas
where as
 It was doubled
 and half of all expenses in 2004. The family spent 1% of income for child care in 1970 however
, It was raising as 10% of their income in 2004.

There is Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'an
a
 unchanged data that was observed
 expenses of entertainment in both years. The expenses of food and transport were decreasing percentage with respect to 25% to 12% and 13% to 5% from 1970 to 2004

IELTS academic Pie chart bellow give information about the house hold expenditures of an average vs family in different years. summarizes the information by selecting and reporting the main features

Academic

American English

2 paragraphs

83 words

This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1

4.0

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
?
One main idea per paragraph
?
Include an introduction and conclusion
?
Support main points with an explanation and then an example
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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Vary your linking phrases using synonyms

Lexical Resource: 7.0

Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes

Grammatical Range: 6.5

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
Check your writing for errors

Task Achievement: 5.5

Answer all parts of the question
?
Present relevant ideas
Fully explain these ideas
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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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