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Percentage of people using number of social sites

Percentage of people using number of social sites wOYwY
The bar chart compares the two years 2014 and 2015 in terms of number of sites used by people in Canada. As per data includes number of social networking sites and the statistics of users in percentage. Overall, the use of one site among folks was maximum over two years. The minimum use can be seen in the figures of five networking platforms in both years. In regard to knowledge of percentage of users in the graph the significant drop in proportions can be seen in one site from 36 to 28 percentage while the use of three social networking platforms raised by 4% in 2015. However, usage of four and five sites increased gradually over 2 years while the percent of citizens using no sites dropped steadily from 22 in 2014 to 21 in 2015 respectively. There was no dramatic raises in two websites although the proportion rose slightly around 1% in a year.
The bar chart compares the two years 2014 and 2015 in terms of number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in Canada.

As per data includes number of social networking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
and the statistics of users in percentage.

Overall
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
site
among folks was maximum over two years. The minimum
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in the figures of five networking platforms in both years.

In regard to knowledge of percentage of users in the graph the significant drop in proportions can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
site
from 36 to 28 percentage while the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of three social networking platforms raised by 4% in 2015.
However
, usage of four and five
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
increased
gradually
over 2 years while the percent of citizens using no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
dropped
steadily
from 22 in 2014 to 21 in 2015
respectively
. There was no dramatic raises in two websites although the proportion rose
slightly
around 1% in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
.
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IELTS academic Percentage of people using number of social sites

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
155 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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