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number of visitors in a british museum

number of visitors in a british museum nRGDg
The line graph illustrates information about the quantity of visitors per month in three kind of museum in summer of 2013 and is measured in thousands. Overall, it can be immediately seen that the number of visitors in British and Science museum increased while natural history museum experienced downward trend. At the beginning of the period, Number of visitors in British museum stood at 600 thousand while Natural history and Science museum accounted for 550 and 400 thousands of guests, respectively. However, over the following month, there was a sharp increase in number of visitors in British museum that peaked at almost 750 thousand. At the same time, in the month of July, both of Science and Natural history museum were experiencing downward trend. Number of guests in August hit the low of 300 thousands guest while British museum saw dramatic drop that reached 500 thousand. At the end of period, all kind of museum increased sharply: Science museum made up about 450 thousand of visitors, a little bit higher number of guests have been demonstrated by Natural history while British landmark reached almost 650 thousand.
The line graph illustrates information about the quantity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
per month in three
Possible agreement error. The noun 'kind' seems to be countable, so consider using: "kinds".
kind
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
in summer of 2013 and
is measured
in thousands.
Overall
, it can be immediately
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
in British and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
increased while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
experienced downward trend.

At the beginning of the period,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
in British
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
stood at 600 thousand while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
accounted for 550 and
Use a singular form of the numeral here: "400 thousand".
400 thousands of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guests
,
respectively
.
However
, over the following month, there was a sharp increase in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
in British
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
that peaked at almost 750 thousand. At the same time, in the month of July, both of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
were experiencing downward trend.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guests
in August hit the low of 300 thousands
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guest
while British
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
dramatic drop that reached 500 thousand. At the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of period, all kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
increased
sharply
:
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Science
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
made up about 450 thousand of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
, a
Reduce redundancy by using "little" or "bit".
little bit
higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
guests
have
been demonstrated
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
while British landmark reached almost 650 thousand.
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IELTS academic number of visitors in a british museum

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
186 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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